Shifter – A Lesson In Story Building

It’s been quite a while since I’ve done a review on here. In fact, I haven’t done one since the first one I did for Hunter by Joanna White. (If you haven’t read that yet, you can read it here.)

As with the review of Hunter, I’m going to split my review into two sections. The first is intended for my readers who simply want a new book to read. If you’re not interested in spoilers or seeing the craft in the book picked apart to learn from it, then this first review is for you! However, if you’re interested as a writer trying to learn what works well in writing (or what doesn’t in some cases with books), the second review is for you.

Let’s get started!

Reader’s Review

As a reader, I’ll be honest in saying that I enjoyed Hunter more. That said, I did eventually get into Shifter, and I really enjoyed it once I did. It just took me a bit. Part of the problem for me, personally, was that I was so attached to Jared and Averella from Hunter that I wasn’t really ready for a move to a new set of characters or a new ship. That said, I believe that Joanna has since published a short story, Sightless, that helps to give a bit more final ending to Jared and Averella’s story, at least for the time being. Had I read this before Shifter, I may have had an easier time transitioning. 

That said, I did enjoy the book. It made me smile, laugh, and cry. I’m not a big crier usually, so the fact that the book could make me cry is a good indication that it really got me invested in the characters. The struggles the characters went through really resonated with me, and I was rooting for them the whole way. I don’t want to spoil anything for anyone, but I will say that I thoroughly enjoyed the action scenes, the entire premise of different kinds of shifters, and the way she moved through the book. The plot took a variety of twists and turns that I didn’t expect, and the end was definitely no exception.

The end wasn’t my favorite. Be warned ahead of time that it’s a bit bittersweet. It definitely made me sad. I wouldn’t say it spoiled the book for me because there was clear evidence that it was only the beginning of a bigger story, but it took a while for me to accept how it ended. Then again, if a book can pull at your heartstrings enough to make you feel pain, joy, or anger, the author has done their job well. Assuming they’ve elicited the emotional response they were going for, that is! I feel the author knew what she was doing and wrote the ending the way she did intentionally, so I don’t feel it really took away from the book.

Overall, I would definitely recommend this to people who enjoyed Hunter or who are just looking for clean fantasy to read. As a bonus for those who are Christian, the book does have strong Christian ethical themes and a morally solid message. If you’re looking for that, this won’t disappoint there. Even if you aren’t, the story is still an enjoyable read.

Writer’s Review

**Spoiler Alert: If you want to read this book before you pick it apart to learn how to improve your own writing or if you just want to read the book for sheer enjoyment, do not read any further! Read the book first and then read this or just don’t read this at all. That said, if you aren’t intending to read the book, already have, or don’t care about spoilers, welcome to the section for those of you looking to learn more about the craft!**

So, Shifter had some interesting things in it that never showed up in Hunter. I wasn’t really expecting them, to be honest. I’d read other stuff by Joanna, but apparently, I hadn’t read anything that had these elements prior to reading Shifter. So, I have a few interesting points to pick out for you all today!

Languages

The first really big thing I noticed in Shifter that wasn’t present in Hunter was the use of another language. In Shifter, Joanna builds her own language for the Shifter clans (mostly for the dragon Shifters). This was entirely unexpected, frankly. She’s put awesome bits of world-building into her work before, but, as I said, there were elements I hadn’t seen before, and this was one of them.

This one was a bit of both positive and negative for me. On the positive side, I absolutely loved the level of realism it lent to the story. I mean, we have multiple languages in real life, so why not in fantasy on another planet? I appreciated that Joanna took the time to create a very consistent-sounding language to incorporate. She gave the words life and meaning, and she used similar or common sounds to help make the words feel like they could be part of a real language. This is a technique that I noted was useful in my post on building languages on Saturday Setups.

But here’s the negative side of it. The words’ sounds weren’t intuitive. This made it difficult to decide how a name or a word ought to be pronounced. Now, I know that as writers, we have to give our readers some creative license. We have to understand that readers won’t pronounce things like we do all the time. But the hope is they can get close. For Shifter, it took me over half the book to even get close to remember how different letter combinations should sound.

In Joanna’s favor, though, was the fact that she did have a main character who didn’t know the language. So, the male lead, Beroan, had to explain how things were pronounced and tell Nsi, our female lead, how to say words or what those words meant. This helped alleviate some of the frustration of not knowing how to pronounce the sometimes odd combinations of letters. I did appreciate that.

On the whole, I would say that this technique is one to use carefully. As you can see, Joanna’s use of it had some downsides but also some upsides. I don’t think she made a poor choice to include it, but when she built it, she might have, in hindsight, wanted to make the words a little more reader-friendly.

So that’s something all of us should keep in mind if we choose to create languages to become a part of the world-building. Use combinations of sounds that the reader can at least guess at. Use pronunciations that readers can get close to by looking at the word.

And if you aren’t going to do that, provide a glossary in the back with the foreign-sounding words and their meanings so that readers who might be bugged by this can have a guide to look at. (Trust me… As a reader who can get frustrated by an inability to figure out a pronunciation, a pronunciation and meaning guide is something I greatly appreciate.)

Ending With a Bang

Okay, so I understand why Joanna wrote the ending the way she did, but as a reader, the ending she used in Shifter didn’t really leave me satisfied initially. As a writer, I understand that it was a structurally sound ending, but emotionally, that didn’t really compute. What Joanna did with Shifter was to end it with Beroan, the dragon-shifter male lead, dying in the final boss fight. This, of course, broke Nsi’s heart. Mine too, frankly.

I was not expecting this ending at all! I mean, I expected injuries. Even severe injuries. But not this. An ending like this could majorly backfire because readers get attached to your main characters. Beroan, in particular, was a very likeable character. So this is another technique that I advise using with caution. You don’t want your reader to see the ending coming, but you may not want to go to these extremes. In some cases, such as Joanna’s, there’s a good reason and one that’s called for. But if you don’t have that good reason, don’t go here.

Here’s why. A reader who sees this ending and is upset can still look back through Shifter and recognize the signs that this was the ending. They didn’t see them while reading, but they see them now. If those reasons are not good, clear, and strong, the reader is going to feel cheated, not just upset. As writers, it’s our job to deliver an ending that sticks with the reader in some way. But if it’s a sad or bad ending, we have an extra responsibility to give the reader justification for that. Joanna has, I feel, done this in Shifter, but it could easily have gone the other way too. Make sure you think carefully before utilizing this technique!

Conclusion

Shifter was a great novel in my opinion. I would highly recommend reading it for anyone who likes clean fiction with Biblical themes and morally upright principles. You can find Shifter here or follow Joanna White on Amazon here.

Sunday Sub-Genres: Assassin Fantasy

Introduction

Assassin fantasy is quite an interesting sub-genre of fantasy. This sub-genre is another one that can get quite dark, but this generally occurs more in the world or setting than anything, and the grey morality an assassin brings to the stage can be quite helpful. The genre itself is relatively easy to understand because the name says it all, but let’s go through some of the finer points.

Defining Assassin Fantasy

Like I said earlier, this one’s pretty straightforward. Assassin fantasy is about an assassin and is set in a fantasy world. The complicated parts of the story fall more in the characterization and the plotline than they do in what the genre is. Unlike weird and grimdark fantasy, this one is pretty easily defined, and no one debates the definition. The assassin archetype has been around in fiction for quite some time, though assassin fantasy itself has only become popular in the recent years. With that definition down, let’s look at writing the sub-genre.

Writing Assassin Fantasy

Focus

First of all, assassin fantasy varies widely in its focus. Some assassin fantasy focuses heavily on character development. These stories don’t focus on and really don’t care much about the politics and morality of what’s going on. It’s just about how the character grows and develops through the course of the story. If that happens to include some sort of moral ultimatum or debate, so be it. If not, no one’s losing any sleep. The other side of this, of course, is assassin fantasy that’s all about the politics and morality of the story and its characters. Authors writing this sort of assassin fantasy may go into great detail about the political system or what constitutes right and wrong and why.

Magic

Again, this is another area where the sub-genre doesn’t have one consistent rule. Some books may have a high level of magic while others may have none at all or very little. In some assassin fantasy, the assassin may wield the magic, while in others, he or she could be the one hunting those who use it. It all depends on the angle the author wishes to approach the sub-genre from.

Characterization

This one leaves no question whatsoever. Assassin fantasy is extremely character-driven. You must have this element. Without it, your story will fall short of readers’ expectations for the sub-genre. This means that knowing your character inside and out isn’t negotiable. It’s a must. That may mean that this sub-genre is more difficult for some writers who tend toward less characterization and more thematic or world-focused writing. But, whatever the case may be, this is one element where assassin fantasy won’t waver.

Plot

This one is another area where the lines are well-drawn. The level of complexity in the stories of this sub-genre are very high. These are the types of stories where anyone could stab you in the back, and no one is as they seem. Twists and turns with revelations that make the plot even more complicated are common within the genre. If you as a writer aren’t fond of writing stories with lots of surprises and unexpected situations that make things more complex, this probably isn’t the genre for you. 

Of course, chances are high that you already know whether or not this sub-genre is for you. Because it’s so well-defined, people are usually on one side of the fence or the other about it. It has a lot of violence and many grey areas, so most people have an opinion. If it isn’t something you like reading, it probably won’t be something you like writing. That’s fine, but you should acknowledge that and move on.

Conclusion

This genre can offer some very unique opportunities to explore the greyer and darker areas of life. However, it can also be a bit of a disturbing read or project for some readers and writers because the content is dark and usually violent. If you’re not comfortable with those things, this isn’t the genre for you. As usual, I’ve included a list of books in the genre for those looking to do some extra reading. Due to the nature of the sub-genre, I wouldn’t personally recommend these for anyone younger than 16 or 17.

Additional Resources and Books

Eve Forward’s Villains by Necessity

Robin Hobb’s Farseer Trilogy

Brent Week’s Night Angel Trilogy (I have read the first one in the series and found that I did enjoy it immensely. It had some minor issues in the writing and grammar, but I liked the plot. Other readers’ reviews of it were mixed, but at some point, I hope to put my own review up on the review section of the blog to give another perspective on it.)

Kage Baker’s The Anvil of the World

Cornelia Funke’s Thief Lord (This one is actually intended for children and was a good read.)

Flash Fiction Fridays: Proposal

Hi, everyone! This week, we have a scene with Dhiabhan and Rhubhian from Bane of Ashkarith!

~~~

How long had it been since he’d been this nervous? He couldn’t even remember. No one, not even his father, had the capacity to do this to him. Only her. He tugged at the collar of his jacket with a sigh and exited the shop with his purchase tucked safely into his pocket. Would she like what he’d bought her? Would she refuse it? Gods, he hoped not.

His finger ran over the cool wood of the box, and he smiled. Neither one of them had ever imagined there would be a day when they wouldn’t have to be slave and master, prince and subject. He certainly hadn’t thought a day would come when he was free to love her without fear of losing her because of his weakness. But that day had come.

He kicked at the cobblestones of the path, listened to the tinkle of the wind through the wind chimes, and watched the carriages hurdle past down the sewage-laden streets. What a glorious day to be alive! Hopefully Rhubhian would echo that sentiment when he showed her what he’d bought.

He turned the box over and over in his pocket, fingers playing over the polished surface and the cold silver clasp that kept it firmly locked shut. His grin broadened as the airfield came into sight between the stone and mortar houses of the tradesmen living on the edges of town. The sun spilled over amber waves of grass dotted with purple and red autumnal flowers. He stopped by the edge of the fields and picked a few with pursed lips.

She might refuse his gift, but she’d never turn down flowers. Especially not these ones. He sucked in a breath of the freedom-laden air and quickened his pace. He nearly pranced down the pathway in the field as he approached the tents, but he forced himself to stay calm and walk at a pace that matched his usual brisk walk.

His men watched him with knowing grins and winks. He scowled at them, but even their knowledge of what was meant to be a secret didn’t dampen his mood. Why should it? Things couldn’t be better in his world, and if she didn’t refuse, he might even be forced to revise that opinion.

He flung the tent flap of his home aside and ducked inside.

Rhubhian swayed gently as she worked at tidying up the tent, her soft voice lifted in some song from her homeland. He paused at the door, drinking in her movements and the cadence of her song. She’d never sung while they were in his father’s court, and since leaving, he’d determined he would never let anyone steal away something she so obviously enjoyed again. “Ru?”

She stopped humming and spun to face him, dipping her head to hide the huge smile breaking out over her face. “You’re back, Eras.”

He strode to her and lifted her by the waist to swing her around before settling her petite frame against his. “Indeed I am. And I come bearing gifts.” He produced the flowers from his pocket and handed them to her.

She smiled and stood on her toes to press her lips to his. “They’re beautiful. Thank you.”

He cleared his throat, the nerves returning. “Yes, well. I have something else to give you, actually.”

She bit her lip. “You seem uncertain. Is something wrong?”

He shook his head then paused and shrugged. “Not yet. Maybe not at all. It depends on what you say.”

She frowned. “What I say?”

Dhiabhan nodded and slowly pulled the wooden box from his pocket, drawing her in with one arm to show her. “I have a very important question to ask you.”

“And it has to do with that box?”

He smiled and pressed a kiss to her temple. “Perceptive as always. It does.”

“What’s the gift, then? The box or what’s in it?”

“What’s in it.” He flipped the latch open and lifted the lid on the sandalwood box with its gold inlay and silver filigree. “In my culture, we had a tradition a long time ago. Long before we began to disrespect our woman and treat them as lesser beings. As the tradition went, the men presented these to their lovers in the hopes that they might…” His voice choked off, and he stared down at the glinting ring with its blue face and delicate silver design work. “In the hopes that they might do their men the honor of wedding them.”

Rhubhian sucked in a breath and reached out to touch the ring with trembling fingers. “And this? This is the question you wanted to ask me?”

He placed the box in her hands and closed her fingers around it. Then he enveloped her hands in his and drew her close. “Yes. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife, Ru?”

Her smile veiled with tears, she laughed. “It is long overdue, is it not?”

“I apologize for that, my love.” Dhiabhan squeezed her hands. “Had I been free of my conniving father, I would have brought the question to you a long time ago.”

She smiled and nodded. “Well, I suppose I can accept that explanation. And yes, Eras. I will marry you.”

He stared down at her with a soft smile on his lips, cupped her face in his hands, and marveled at how such a delicate creature could place her trust and her heart in his work-worn hands. He really didn’t deserve such great love. But whether he deserved it or not, he had it, and he didn’t plan on letting it go. He pressed his forehead to hers with a wide smile. “Thank you. This day can’t get any better now, thanks to you.”

“Glad to help.”

He kissed her gently and helped her put the ring on. For a moment, he stood there, admiring the way it glimmered in the lights from the lamps. She was his. Really, truly his. For forever, until death did them part. And he couldn’t have been more ecstatic.

~~~

That’s it for this week! Have something you’d like to see in this section of the blog? Feel free to leave suggestions below or send them to my email address from the contact page.

Work-In-Progress Wednesdays #23

This week, I have an excerpt from the most recent section of Pathway of the Moon. I’m already finishing up Part Four of Six. I’m really excited about how much progress I’ve made, and I can’t wait to start on the sequel. I’m slowly working on planning that. At any rate… Enjoy!

~~~

ALRIAN huddled in the reeds on the shoreline. The water lapped at her bare feet, and she shivered. The moon hung full and heavy overhead, a silent testament to the remaining time. Too much of it. Something snapped in the distance, and she retreated further into the reeds. Was it Shiador? The noise quieted. Not Shiador, then.

She let out a soundless sigh. She’d hid well. He wouldn’t find her if she stayed here. But she couldn’t hide until dawn anymore like they’d planned. With Leo and Deira’s arrest, she had to find her way to them. But she didn’t know where they were, and she had to figure it out without being caught by Shiador. Thankfully, she was certain he was searching obvious places. He still believed he was in possession of superior intellect, so why would he start in the good hiding spots? A dumb girl like her obviously wouldn’t be smart enough to prepare or think through her hiding places. And the women he was used to would never break the rules the men laid out.

After their last run in, he should already know she wasn’t anything like the women in camp, but she wouldn’t complain about how dense he was. It was working in her favor at the moment. She listened a moment longer, then stretched her stiff limbs in preparation for the swim back to the mainland. Her clothes had barely dried from her last swim.

She sighed.

Swimming with them was possible, of course, but was it really wise? The cold water and damp cloth against her skin for hours more could slow her down and make her sick if the air got any colder. She groaned softly and began to peel the thin clothing off. Bundling it together, she used the thin sash from the dress to tie it to her shoulders for the swim. She’d wait for it to dry again before she redressed. It was barely any protection against the wind anyway.

Then she took a deep breath and plunged into the water. The cold crashed into her, spread through her bones. But she pulled on her ashtra and forced her limbs to keep moving through the moonlit waters.

Ten minutes later, she dragged herself out of the water and onto the bank. Pushing her sopping wet hair out of her face, she sprawled out and took slow, shallow breaths to slow her heart rate. Best to take a moment to recover now while she knew Shiador wasn’t anywhere too close by.

While she rested against the cool, damp grass, she took a moment to think. Where would the Pathway be? Would Leo and Deira be there or would they have escaped already? She didn’t have any answers, though if they were still at the Pathway, it was probably because Leo was incapacitated. And they couldn’t be near any source of water because Amadeira would have been able to use that against them.

The wind played over her bare, damp skin, and she shivered. Somewhere in the distance, a fox released a sharp alarm cry and another one picked it up. She pushed herself to her feet and crept into the bushes. The sounds were quite far away, but who knew what had alarmed the animals. She veered away from the sound and headed for the camp. It was probably the last place Shiador would think to look, and it would be the first place she might find clues to the Path’s whereabouts.

Something hooted, and she jumped. The soft flutter of wings in the night met her attentive ear. She sighed. Nothing but a bird. If she made it out of this alive, she swore she would never spend the night alone in a creepy forest again. And she’d definitely make sure she stayed armed if she ever ended up the hunted instead of the hunter.

Speaking of arms, hadn’t Leo left a few knives and other weapons back in the little cottage? If she could make it there, she’d at least have some measure of protection on her if Shiador ran across her. Better that than nothing, and with the element of surprise, she might even stand a chance. And while she was there, maybe she could find a warm change of clothes.

She glanced up into the foliage overhead. The moon shone as bright as ever. She heaved a sigh and began the trudge back toward the camp. The sounds of the animals in the forest enveloped her, and she let them guide her through the forest safely. If she heard cries of alarm or disturbances nearby or in the distance, she stayed away from that area.

But the forest was large, and in the moonlight, it looked far different than it did during the day. Going a different direction from usual also hadn’t helped. Was she even on the right track? The forest began to thin, and a path cleared for her. She frowned and followed the trail. 

Things began to look more familiar. There was the old twisted tree that had been hit by lightning. And there was the stone with odd carving on it. Her shoulders sagged in relief. She slowed her pace and moved from the cover of one tree to the next. If anyone was watching for her, hopefully this would keep her out of their sight. She paused on the edge of the woods. Would anyone be watching for her? Would they suspect she might try to return to the cabin in search of her friends?

She peered around the trunk of a tree. No lights lit the cottage from within, and everything was quiet outside. Shiador had hardly been quiet in his initial pursuit of her, and she doubted he would bother doing so now. He wanted her running and terrified out of her mind so she wouldn’t think straight. Too bad for him. She wasn’t the type to do that. Maybe if he’d met her before she joined the military, he might have had more luck.

She rolled her eyes. As if. He’d only have had more luck because she wasn’t trained to deal with situations like this back then. She slipped out from behind the tree and hurried to the cottage. No one stopped her, and no one tried to accost her. The place was deserted. She turned the knob on the back door. The handle turned with ease, and she pushed inside.

Nothing moved or made a sound in the cottage’s interior. She eased the door shut behind her and hurried toward her trunk in the living room. She stumbled over an overturned cushion from the couch and stubbed her toe on the edge of a table leg. The search party Kiarhsu had assembled had left no stone unturned, and it seemed they had also left the house in disarray when they’d left. She slowed down and squinted to make out the shadowy shapes by the moonlight streaming in the window. If only she could turn on a light. But that was too risky.

She groped around beside the love seat until she located the trunk she’d thrown her clothes and weapons into. Opening the lid, she sighed. At least her things were still in the trunk. Someone had folded everything neatly, and she guessed Deira must have done so while she was trying not to go mad with stress before she and Leo were moved to the Path. She dug through it and laid out a warm shirt, loose fitting pants, a belt, and her weapons. Then she yanked the soaking wet dress the camp’s women had adorned her in off her back. The cursed thing looked like a shapeless, sad mess now. She wadded it up even more and threw it into a corner. Infernal invention. She dragged the shirt over her head and then tugged on her pants with a grim smile. Much better suited for what she was doing. Traipsing about the woods naked or clothed in a flimsy dress meant to slow her down was Rith’s own curse. No woman deserved to be chased through the forest by a madman in clothing that was designed to slow her flight.

And besides. She had another mission to perform. Besides evading Shiador, that was. She strapped her sword on and strode to the front door this time. A quick peek out the windows confirmed that no one was lurking around in wait, so she pushed the door open inch-by-inch until she could squeeze out. Shutting it behind her, she scanned the immediate surroundings. Nothing.

The birds and other night animals were creating the usual soft buzz of noise in the background. Nothing had come this way recently besides her, and they knew she was not a threat. Her shoulders sagged. That was one problem out of her way. The next problem was a bigger one: would the women be willing to help her?

She squared her shoulders. Only one way to find out.

~~~

Thanks for reading! What are you guys up to? Feel free to share in the comments below. I’d love to see what all of you are working on right now.

Flash Fiction Fridays: Orian

This week’s flash fiction is about Dairdra and Orian from the Throne of War series. Enjoy!

~~~

Dairdra ran her fingers through the inch of warm water in the tub, watched the hot water cascade from the tap. How long had it been since she’d really enjoyed life? And how long had it been since she’d laughed so much in a day? With a man, no less. 

She’d thought the part of her that could enjoy a man’s company like that was long dead. After all, it hadn’t made an appearance since Crypt’s death four years ago. She’d resumed her duties as Queen and had taken onto her shoulders the role her husband should’ve had, and no one had questioned the pieces of her heart that were missing. Some days, those pieces, which were firmly planted in the Second Life when Crypt died, warred with the pieces of her heart that were still solidly attached to this world. 

No one had pushed her to pursue a match in the first year or so, but now everyone kept hinting at it, kept introducing her to different eligible bachelors. Why not? She was old enough to wed and finally hand over her extra duties to someone fit to shoulder them. But did she want to?

Not particularly. The reasons for that were a jumble though. First, she didn’t want to marry after losing Crypt. Her insecurities and fears of losing any new lover were too great. Second, she wasn’t sure if she would be happy taking the more traditional roles a Queen took, and she was certain that few of the men she’d met so far would be happy if she wanted equality in ruling the kingdom. 

But now all of those reasons were in a tangled mess at the bottom of her heart. Orian–the dark-haired, blue-eyed devil–was the man responsible for shaking her foundations and causing her to question what she really wanted. He had brought to life parts of her that she thought were well and truly dead. Somehow, though, he had done the impossible and had raised her battered heart’s hopes. 

She pulled her hand out of the bathwater with a groan. Claudius would love this. He’d be ringing the wedding bells with no further ado if she told him Orian had caught her eye. In fact, she was fairly certain her head councilor had been just waiting for her to take a shine to the prince since his arrival four months ago. Of course, if she was to allow Orian the chance to publicly court her, as he’d requested, she’d have to get the Council’s permission, and that meant informing Claudius.

She shook her head and began to strip. Well, it was an issue that would have to be dealt with eventually. She needed a partner and someone who would help her shoulder the burden. The crown was a heavy, lonely duty, and though she loved her people dearly, she was finally ready to admit that she wanted someone beside her. Just so long as that someone didn’t think she’d be happy with being demoted to silent supporter and mother. But she was fairly sure Orian wasn’t the sort to react to her that way. And if he was, she could always kick him back through the Gate he’d been sent through.

That was it, then. In the morning, she would tell the Council she intended to give Orian a chance. Sighing, she settled down into the bath. Until then, she would let the warm water soothe her troubled mind and her fearful heart. No sense in losing a good night’s sleep over this.

~~~

I hope you all enjoyed it! If you have something you’d like to see or a character you want to see more about in the flash fiction Friday posts, feel free to leave the suggestion in the comments or send me an email! I’m always open to hearing what you all are interested in reading.

Work-In-Progress Wednesdays #22

This week’s WIP Wednesday is an excerpt from the latest chapter of Pathway of the Moon.

~~~

LEO tried to catch a glimpse of Foren as he and Amadeira were dragged from the cabin into the woods beyond. The moon shone down in silver-white on the ground and dappled the faces of the antagonizers who surrounded him. Not a friendly face in sight. Had Foren given up on helping now that their plans had been blown apart? Or had he too been discovered and locked away to await sentencing?

His mind drifted to Alrian for a minute. She’d be undergoing the preparations of an Equinox Bride right now. Hardly anything enjoyable. But he’d have to leave her safety to her now because he couldn’t do anything for her. He wasn’t even sure he could do anything for himself without risking Amadeira. That wasn’t an option, and fighting his way free would leave her vulnerable. He couldn’t protect her and himself while going on the offensive. Not against this many enemies.

So he let them drag him along without making a fuss. Beside him, Amadeira was silent, but when he looked over, he caught the glimmer of her tears on her cheeks. She glanced at him and tried to offer a smile, but it fell seconds later. He groaned. If his hands were free right now, he would take her in his arms and wipe those tears away. He’d comfort her until she no longer wept or felt fear. But his arms weren’t free, and he had no comfort to offer. Not when he didn’t have the first clue how they were supposed to survive this.

He’d have to make it up as he went along. There wasn’t exactly another option at the moment. He’d reevaluate their position when they reached the Pathway. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe Kiarhsu would only have him flogged instead of putting him to death. They needed his blood, but they didn’t need to kill him for that.

Which brought up another problem. He didn’t want them to open the Pathway at all. And his blood could open it. They weren’t likely to give him a say in what was done with the blood spilling from his veins later on when they bled him under the full moon. Shame, really. But what villain would give his hostage a chance to voice an opinion? It just didn’t work out well. Best to keep them quiet.

He swallowed back a laugh. What was he doing? He should be thinking of ways to escape, not letting his mind ramble to every absurd, obvious thing it could find to dwell upon. This wouldn’t help them out at all. He forced his mind back to the task at hand. Forming a plan with very little to go on.

Kiarhsu waved at his men, and Leo received a boot to the back. He stumbled forward, tripped over a dip in the path, and dropped to his knees. The men hauled him up roughly and lifted him onto a horse where he was promptly tied to the saddle. No escape there, it seemed. Not that it would do him much good to escape without Amadeira. And Kiarhsu knew it, Rith take him! He scowled down at the man who had ruined everything in just under a day. How much longer until he could be rid of the pest?

Right. Not until he actually had a plan. Well, that was frustrating, but it couldn’t be helped. He slouched down in the saddle with a grumpy growl, but he didn’t give the men eyeing him warily any cause to hit him or bring him back into line with brute force. Best to save the fighting for a moment when he could actually achieve freedom with Amadeira at his side. This was not such a time.

~~~

That’s it for this week! What have you guys been working on? Feel free to share it in the comments.

Sunday Sub-Genres: Grimdark Fantasy

Introduction

While we’ve examined some very dark, gritty versions of fantasy, this sub-genre is one of the darkest. It is considered a sub-genre of fantasy that is notorious for its grittiness and darkness. However, whatever the views people have of it, the genre has become more popular since George R.R. Martin’s wildly successful book A Song of Ice and Fire. So let’s take a look.

Defining Grimdark Fantasy

Pinning down a definition for grimdark fantasy is difficult. For some, it is a byword for fantasy that is unnecessarily dark. For those who enjoy the genre, they would openly admit that grimdark fantasy is both grim and dark with a lot of grit, but not necessarily without reason. Many times, grimdark is meant to explore the psychology behind those sword-toting heroes and the dark, harsh reality of the world. As a result of showing the grittier side of life, the stories get a bad rap for being brutal, dark, and sometimes depraved. While that may be true of some grimdark, the genre does not require writers to include unnecessary gore or wickedness in order to be grimdark. For those of you who want to remain sensitive to the sensibilities of others while still being true to the reality of life, grimdark can still hold a place for you. The genre is more focused on showing the truth about reality in a fantasy setting and showing that real people don’t always do things for the right moral reason, even when their action may be good in the eyes of others. This is reality, and the fact that you’re writing fantasy doesn’t necessitate keeping everything fairy-tale sparkly (well, Disney version of the fairytales, anyway. The real ones can, themselves, be more grimdark in style than you’d expect.).

Writing Grimdark Fantasy

Since it’s a bit difficult to pin down what grimdark is, let’s take a look at what readers of the genre look for in grimdark.  These are elements commonly found in grimdark that you can use to give your book the sub-genre’s unique flavor for readers of the sub-genre.

Morally Ambiguous Characters

In real life, while there are some things that are morally clear as right or wrong, there are things that aren’t so clear. And even if some things are morally black and white, some people may not see them that way even if they should. Grimdark is all about characters who struggle to figure out what moral black and white are in their situations. This manifests in the question of “why” they did what they did. Why did the knight save the princess? Did he do it because it was the right thing to do or because he wanted something out of it? Was it struggle to decide what to do and whether or not it was worth risking life and limb for this woman? That’s just one example of how moral ambiguity can manifest itself, but the main point is that your characters are just like real people: they struggle to know what is morally right and wrong throughout the novel. Not on every issue, perhaps, but they’ll have their moments.

Messed Up Characters

This one is not necessarily a must for grimdark, but it’s certainly common. Not to be confused with morally confused characters, the messed up characters are the ones who truly are on the side of immorality. They aren’t making mistakes, and they’re probably not confused about how evil what they’re doing is. They act in their own interests every time, and if they leads to a “good” act, great. But you can rest assured that, if they look like a saint, it’s only because it benefits them somehow. They’re wolves in sheep’s clothing. Be aware that if you have a main character like this, which isn’t unheard of in this sub-genre, readers may feel betrayed when they discover the MC isn’t who they assumed he was. This means that you have to be careful in how you reveal the character’s true nature. However, this has been done with great effect and without losing readers, so I wouldn’t say this should discourage you from trying.

Pure Naturalism

With this one, we go back to the motivations we were discussing. Many times, grimdark uses emotional drivers or goals of the characters to drive action. People do all sorts of the things in the name of emotion or a goal they want badly enough. The actions themselves can look good or bad, but the motivations underneath them may not match the appearance of the behavior. Most often, selfishness is a motivation in grimdark fantasy. In this style of grimdark, there is no right or wrong, good or evil. Only what gets the character closer to what they want. This isn’t a requirement to write grimdark. You could just as easily flip this around and have a character motivated by a good goal who does awful things trying to achieve it instead of a character motivated by pure selfishness. Either way, a character following this motto of grimdark will act purely on what will get him closer to the goal, not based on whether the action itself is good or bad.

Tight Narrative Voice

This is one aspect of grimdark that really is a must. A tight narrative voice allows the reader to experience the world through the eyes of the viewpoint character. They don’t get a broad view with an impartial narrator because grimdark is all about the character and his characterization, so naturally, the focus will be with the character. This means that using deep point-of-view, which we will discuss next week on Thursday Technicalities, is a really great writing technique to use for grimdark fantasy.

Plot Complexity and Characterization

These two generally go together in this sub-genre because the plot is moderately complex by itself, but highly complex when you start introducing morally ambiguous, manipulative characters. Grimdark is a sub-genre that is focused mostly on the characters. The plot may be action-oriented, but there will be many twists and turns that you wouldn’t find in other action-oriented plots simply because the characters are capable of anything, just as humans are in real life.

Which leads to another point on the characterization. Grimdark often gets a bad rap because anything goes, no matter how dark and depraved. But here’s the reason why that’s the case: grimdark writers know that humanity is capable of unspeakable evil, and they’re bent on making the reader face a flawed humanity. In some ways, they have a more realistic view of humanity in their writing than those writing high fantasy with sparkly clean characters do. While I don’t advocate gratuitous violence, grimdark definitely has an aspect to it that’s raw and real, which I do advocate in characterization. However, this sort of characterization that forces the reader to view humanity as inherently flawed, is not popular in the lighter sub-genres of fantasy. It has, instead, found its home in grimdark fantasy, which is the grittiest of the fantasy sub-genres. There are no knights in shining armor here, or if there are, they’ve got an unbelievable number of skeletons hidden away in their closets. There is no hero to sweep in and save the day because everyone is flawed, and no one is truly a hero.

Dystopian Setting

This one sort of speaks for itself. Most grimdark fantasy is written in a dystopian setting. The degree to which it is dystopian can vary, but the setting must be dystopian for the book to really fit in with grimdark fantasy. This is actually a fairly common thread through most of the darker sub-genres of fantasy. Not all, of course. But many of them feature dystopian settings because the settings work so well with the content.

Dark Endings

Finally, grimdark doesn’t have good or happy endings. If things work out in the favor of one character or another, you can bet that someone somewhere isn’t happy, and that’s the cue for more bloodshed and violence in most cases. So, really, the books are highly unpredictable. You never know what will happen, and the only thing you can guarantee is that everyone will end the story unhappy for one reason or another. Given this and the bleak sense of humor the sub-genre often employs, it isn’t for everyone. If you like happy endings more, this is not a genre you are going to enjoy reading, and since you have to read it to write it well, you should probably steer clear of it.

Conclusion

Grimdark fantasy is a tough sub-genre to write and to read. Its audience is smaller because of the gritty, violent, and depressing nature of the writing. However, for those looking for fiction that takes a real, hard look at what humanity is like underneath all of the various facades it puts up, grimdark is a great place to start. While it may have an overly cynical view of humanity sometimes, readers and writers will come away from it with an understand of just how flawed humanity is.

Additional Reading and Resources

**Because of the nature of grimdark fantasy and how few of these books I have actually looked at in any detail, I do not recommend any of this reading material for children under the age of 18. Please exercise discretion on the books for this. The articles are intended for writers of the genre, so those, with the exception of some language, should be safe enough for teens to read.**

Matt Larkin’s article on grimdark

Mythic Scribes’ article on grimdark fantasy for writers and readers

George R.R. Martin’s Game of Thrones

Steven Erikson’s Gardens of the Moon

Mark Lawrence’s Prince of Fools

Luke Scull’s The Grim Company

Flash Fiction Fridays: Throne of Deception

This week’s flash fiction is about Orian, a new character who will be a main lead in the series Throne of War, which follows the novella In Darkness Lost. The book series, starting with Throne of Deception, will follow an older Dairdra and Orian, a young man sent from another planet to gain her hand and her throne in marriage.

~~~

 Orian stared at the letter he’d received for a moment longer before crumpling it up and throwing it into the fire crackling on the hearth. As if he needed to be reminded what they’d hired him for. He’d been training for this since he was a child. They’d exploited his ability when they found him on the street, and now his sole purpose would be fulfilled. They were sending him off to do what he’d been trained for.

To deceive and lie to a woman who, according to the reports they’d received over the years, had been through more than enough sorrow. The last image that had been displayed on his holo just before the mission’s missive was sent through had been of a woman in her early twenties with lovely waves of black hair that he already wanted to run his fingers through. But what had really caught him about her had been the pain lurking in the fine lines around her eyes and in her straightforward gaze.

Dairdra of Argent. A singular woman. At eighteen, she had led her country through a war that one of their allies had started with no warning. She’d lost both her parents, and a year later, when the war had finally concluded, she’d lost her lover too. After all this, she’d retreated into hiding for a time, and his masters had fumed about how their plans were ruined. But then she had returned, and all had been right with his world again.

As right as it could be, anyway. He opened the picture on his holo device again and stared into the woman’s eyes. Though he’d never met her, he felt some sense of connection to her, a drawing that he couldn’t explain. But what did that matter? She would hate him when she discovered the lies he’d told her. He, who was no prince and who was a liar in every way, would be king, but he would be king of a throne of deception. And he would likely never be the king of her life. What an unfair hand life had dealt. The streets would have been kinder.

But the streets were no longer his. He was not Orian the street urchin. He was Orian of the Thirkians, the only living heir of the previous King and Queen, and he would ensure an alliance for his masters, one that he was certain would be used to exploit the young Queen into lending her aid to a ever-darkening purpose. Oh, he couldn’t confirm it because no one ever told him anything he didn’t have to know. He could lie better if they didn’t tell him why he was doing it. Or so they said. He’d never hated his ability more than he had ever since they had told him it was the reason for the lies he now lived, the reason for the lies that had granted him a throne. A throne of deception indeed.

~~~

That’s it for this week, everyone! I hope you enjoyed this. As I have more information about when Throne of Deception will be published and when it will be made available (in part or in whole) on Wattpad and Inkitt, I’ll let everyone know.

Work-In-Progress Wednesdays #21

This week’s WIP Wednesday excerpt is from In Darkness Lost. I’m still finishing up some last edits, which I was kind of hoping I wouldn’t be doing at this point, but hey… Plans don’t always work out quite according to our wishes. So, this week’s excerpt comes from some of the newer content that’s been added or rearranged.

~~~

RUNNING didn’t help. Dairdra collapsed onto her bed, gasping for breath. Her sides cramped, and she sucked in deep breaths. Closing her eyes, she ran her fingers along the velvety smoothness of her comforter and tried to focus on the gentle current of warm air wafting from the fireplace. The air blew the bed’s gauze curtains against her arms, and the touch pulled her back to the present. She opened her eyes and blinked, her head throbbing.

The warm light of the fire played over the ceiling and gave the room a pleasant, cozy atmosphere. But it didn’t bring any comfort to her. Her chest ached and she buried her face in the silk pillow. Even the release of crying was denied to her, and she lay there, motionless, in tense silence.

She didn’t understand. Why did it have to be her mother? She was too young to shoulder her mother’s load or to take her place. She still needed the one parent who took time for her. She sat up and fisted the comfort in her fingers with a shuddering breath. She suddenly had to move, couldn’t stand sitting on the bed like everything was as it usually was. She moved down onto the floor and sat down.

Still restless, she rocked back and forth on her heels. How was it that one thing had so much power to destroy? Just one minute was all it had taken, and now her life had become a disaster.

She tried to find some bright spot, some hope to cling to, but she couldn’t find anything. Her throat tightened, and the walls of her room suddenly seemed so much closer, the room darker than before. She huddled there on her floor, drew her knees up to her chest. But she couldn’t seem to shake that lost, empty feeling settling into the pit of her stomach. Could anyone fix this? Or would she feel lost and empty forever?

Tears welled up behind her closed lids, then broke free of her lashes and dripped down onto the blue silk of her dress. Stop. This is a time for action and duty, not for crying. She should get up and go speak to her father about what she needed to do with her mother out of commission. She lifted her head and dashed away the tears. Sucking in a deep breath, she rested her forehead against her knees.

Work offered a course of action and a way to escape the growing darkness. She could throw herself into her duties, numb herself to the pain with work. But what were her duties? Her mother spoke of only the organization aspects of the job and the finer points of interacting with the court. She had no idea what else was required because what was required changed based upon what the King demanded of his consort.

Once again, she was reminded of how alone she was. That only added to the yawning void centering in her chest. Since she’d reached adolescence, she’d been dreaming of the man she’d marry. She’d had her hopes too, though she’d only spoken of it once or twice with her mother.

Those hopes had been encouraged, but nothing had come of them because she wasn’t allowed to wed until her eighteenth, a rite of passage she’d reached just a few months back. Besides, the man of her dreams and her secret fantasies had been nothing but a best friend and attentive servant since she’d met him on the day he’d entered the palace as her mother’s protegee. And she’d never felt the disappointment more keenly than she did now when nothing seemed certain anymore.

She rubbed her aching temples. Well, of that was a bridge she’d have to cross when it came to it. For now, it was pointless to add any other worries to the already insurmountable pile. She pushed herself to her feet and dragged her aching body to the bathroom. She hadn’t expected to be this sore from the day’s activities.

Maybe it was her body’s response to the shock. She hadn’t really processed everything that had happened until now, and suddenly she felt tired. Too tired to bother with anything. But going to bed and sleeping away the hours until this was over wasn’t an option.

She splashed cold water from the wash basin over her face and dried it. A quick glance in the mirror confirmed that it hadn’t done much to hide the red-rimmed eyes that were evidence of her pain. But at least she didn’t have tear stains streaking her face.

She turned away from the mirror and shuffled out of her room. Might as well get the things she needed to do accomplished. Maybe then she could collapse and give her body and heart a chance to accept what had happened today. She drifted down the empty colonnaded halls.

The halls were so pristine, and their white, splendid beauty made her heart ache. How could anything be so put-together while she was falling to pieces? It didn’t seem fair. The silver plants that gave Argent her name had always made her smile before, but now they didn’t inspire any emotion at all. They stood in their pots along the rows of columns, but their glittering beauty was distant now, not close and personal.

Everything was cold and distant, and Dairdra’s stomach dropped. She’d never felt loneliness so sharply. Would anything ever feel right again?

That question had no answer. The realization was almost enough to send her running back to her room again. At least there she could close the drapes and hide in darkness. At least her bedroom was a place she could let her control slip. Here, she couldn’t, and she had to bear the pain stoically. She had to be cold and distant just like the plants she used to love so much.

~~~

That’s it for this week! I hope you all enjoyed it. What have you all been working on? Feel free to share in the comments!

Flash Fiction Friday: Nimewe’s Recruitment

This week’s flash fiction is about Nimewe, a character who will appear in the sequel to Pathway of the Moon. This is her graduation/recruitment day as one of the initiates into the Guard, an elite force that protects her planet’s holy sites and life source from the demons that live beneath the surface of the world.

~~~

She stared at the chromium stage where Middles would take the Oaths of the Guard. For a moment, she simply stared at the blinding sun glaring off the white metal. Was it really the day? Was she really going to walk across the stage with the other Middles to graduate from being between two worlds to being a full-fledged Guard with all of the privileges and weaponry that came with it?

Her gaze wandered out over the crowd as she waited in line, tried not to bounce in excitement. The look on her aunt’s face splashed over her in a cold wave, and her excitement snuffed out. She was really doing this, and no one in her family supported her. Well, not what remained of the family, anyway. Her parents would approve of her choice if they were still around to do so. They had fought valiantly against the Cursed when they first surged up to wreak havoc on all of the Sites of Light and those who kept them. And it had cost them their lives just as it might cost her life. 

She looked back at the stage and watched as Aura Mychaiel strode to the podium. Their Aura met her gaze for a moment with a knowing smile, and Nimewe shivered. The older woman’s gaze saw everything. Just like hers did. And she knew then that there was no other place for her. If she walked away, if she didn’t finish the last part of their initiation today, she would have nothing.

No one wanted someone like her, a half-breed between the Aurethel, Chaerel’s oldest people, and the Betweens, a small group of people who had fled Sedra, Mistress of Darkness, after she created them and visited untold horrors upon them. They claimed she wanted to build an army, that she was in fact doing so. No one knew quite what to make of them, but the common consensus had been that they, and eventually their descendants, were liars and entirely insane. That was, until the Cursed poured from the caverns and chased both Between and Aurethel to the skies where they now dwelt.

No one knew why the Cursed hadn’t come sooner, but nothing seemed to restrain them, so it was left to the Guard to protect the holy sites and the planet’s very life force from the daemons who sought to destroy it. That was why she was here. Why her parents had died. It was her heritage, after all. Her mother had been a descendant of one of the Betweens who had come to warn her father’s people. She had grown up despised simply because of her origin and her people, and that hatred had intensified tenfold when Nimewe was born. A freak, people had called her. And when her ability to perceive emotions and thoughts became stronger than that of most other Aurethel, she’d really become an outcast.

But the past was the past, she reminded herself. Enough thinking about it on a day when she was supposed to rejoice. Her enthusiasm returned. She would become a Guard today, and that was the one place where Between and Aurethel alike could coexist with no prejudice or hatred. There wasn’t room when they all faced death every day.

Really, that was what this graduation meant to her. Not a new position. Not prestige in society. No, it meant family. It meant acceptance from her peers and a real chance at friendship for the first time in her life. The loneliness was at an end, and her hard work would finally pay off. This really was it.

She strode across the stage behind the Middle in front of her, a broad smile slipping onto her face. Coming to a stop, she stood with feet spread and planted firmly on the chromium surface of the stage. From there, she stared out across the vast sea of heads to the glass walls that pulsated gently with the energy that kept their sky city aloft. Soon, she would leave this place to begin her new life back on the surface of the planet, fighting to protect a world she dearly loved for its beauty and vivacity.

Aura Mychaiel smiled at her and looped a rainbow-colored chord around her wrist with a soft laugh. “Head out of the clouds, girl. It’s your time. Do you accept the responsibility as one of the Guard of Chaerel and her Fountain of Spectrums to protect both the holy sites and the Fountain as well as the people of Chaerel?”

The words of the Oath sank deep, rooting into her soul, and her smile faded as the seriousness of the situation sank in with the Oath. She nodded, a lump in her throat. “I take responsibility for protecting Chaerel’s holy sites, Fountain, and her people. I swear to put my needs and desires, and even my life, down for this people and this planet we all call home so long as I live or so long as I am able to serve.”

“Welcome to the ranks of the Guard, Nim.” She squeezed her shoulder and pressed her forehead to Nimewe’s before moving down the line.

Nimewe’s smile tugged at the corners of her lips. Finally. It was done. She was one of the Guard.

~~~

That’s it for this week! I hope you all enjoyed. If you have something you’d like to see in future flash fictions, leave me a comment or shoot me an email! I’m always glad for the suggestions.