Tag: fantasy worlds

Work-In-Progress Wednesdays #25

Ariel Paiement

This week, I have an excerpt from a new short story I’m working on for a collection of stories I’m hoping to release in early 2021. The story, Revelar’s Queen, is about a fae serving girl and the Unseelie King. In this story, the Unseelie King is just the name that Earthlings gave to a being from another world, the ones–since one king didn’t survive from the earliest Earth tales of the Seelie and Unseelie up to modern times–who gave rise to the legends of the Unseelie in the first place.

~~~

AISLING wandered the barren halls in a stupor. How had the glorious, awe-inspiring halls of Queen Sairead’s court become like this? Paint-chipped walls and stained carpets, threadbare shades and broken windows. The chandeliers hung dun in their places, and the candelabras had fallen from the walls. In places, the stone even showed through the ruined drywall that had been put up back when it first became an accepted way to build walls. 

She didn’t know this place. Up above, a rafter creaked. She darted forward, narrowly avoiding a beam that had broken loose, bringing an entire section of the roof and the plastering down behind her. She choked on the dust and spun to look at the way back. Blocked. She didn’t even know for certain where she was anymore. This part of the mansion was from the adjoining castle, and it was much, much older. Still, it hadn’t looked like this, and she bit her lip. Should she really continue onward in light of the roof’s clear instability?

Her shoulders slumped. What choice was there? She couldn’t move the rubble now blocking the way out, and she knew no one was in this wing. She wasn’t supposed to be in this wing either, really. But she’d come in here for a place away from the bustle and chaos that was Midsummer’s Festival preparations. A broom closet would’ve been the safer option, evidently.

A set of doors loomed up ahead, the gold gilding on them lackluster and the paint peeling. How long had it been since anyone was in here? No one who was allowed her had talked of this place as an abandoned wreck. They all said it was a quiet, peaceful place meant only for the Queen and her closest advisers.

She approached the doors with careful steps and tried not to make noise as she cracked the doors open. A tiny squeak emitted from the hinges, and she cringed. Stupid. Of course it would creak! Things this old and in such a state of disrepair would make noise when opened. She stiffened and listened for a long moment, but no one moved to accost her or shouted in alarm.

The tension in her shoulders eased, and she released a low, slow sigh. She ran her fingers over the flaking gold and touched the ruined paint. Did she even want to know what was behind them? Did it matter? The hair on the back of her neck stood up, and her entire body tingled. Whatever was behind this door, it would change her life forever. She was certain of that. That thought alone sent a tremor through her. She could still turn around.

But where would she go? The way out was blocked, and no one knew she was here. Better to keep looking for another exit. She pressed her palm to the door and cracked it open just a bit more before peeking inside.

There was a man crouched in the center of the room. She stiffened, her whole body trembling. Why hadn’t he said anything when she first opened the doors? He had to know she was here. And who was he? One of the Queen’s councilors? Another intruder? The last didn’t seem likely. Who would wish to intrude here where there was nothing worth stealing and the roof could cave in at a moment’s notice?

He had his gaze fixed on her and the door, and his uncanny citrine eyes stayed on her even as she backed away from the door. She pressed a hand to her breast, wishing it could still her racing heart. Should she run? Or would it be best to simply admit that she’d been breaking the rules and misbehaving? Maybe if she owned up to it, her punishment would be lighter. After all, if she told him the truth, that she wandered in here just for a moment of peace and quiet, he might be more understanding.

But understanding was the last thing in those eyes, which were still trained on the door and seemed to pierce through to her soul. She swallowed hard and turned to go.

“Going so soon?”

She turned, both startled and enamored by the velvet-and-silk voice that filled the room and spilled out to the hall where she stood. Still, she wasn’t going to walk in there. She took another good look at the man and the room where he was now standing instead of crouching.

He watched her stare from beneath dark lashes, which made his citrine irises more startling still. His clothing was immaculate, unlike the rest of the room, which seemed to be some sort of ballroom. He wore a tailored suit and nicely polished boots. A little behind the times with the boots and the suit’s cut, but then, members of the Queen’s court often dressed as if they were in the nineteenth century. Unlike the other members of the court, though, he possessed a feral look. His hair was unkempt, and his smile was razor sharp. She shivered and looked away from him to the rest of the room. Why did he both terrify and excite her?

The floor around him was dusty, and the light coming through the dingy window just behind him cast the edge of some kind of platform into sharp relief against the floor. Yet, somehow, he didn’t cast a shadow. In that room of decay and despair, he fit in but also stood apart. His wild hair indicated a carelessness that the room’s occupants reflected in letting the curtains be eaten by moths and time unheeded, but his clothes were immaculate. An enigma in every way, even if he did appear to be somewhat at home in the otherwise empty room.

She cracked the door a little more and peered past him at the strange crack in the wall that was emitting an unearthly glow. What could it be? Some sort of portal, maybe? It didn’t look safe, whatever it was. She couldn’t see past the light no matter how hard she strained, but she caught some chords of an ethereal, haunted melody drifting through the room to where she was standing.

“Will you hide there all day, daughter of shadows?”

She bit her lip, ignored the strange rush of warmth his sultry voice sent through her and shook her head. Something about this was wrong. She backed away from the door again, determined to run this time. He never gave her the chance. The second she turned her back, hard fingers dug into her waist, pulled her back and held her still. How dare he do this? She squirmed and kicked at his shins, but it didn’t achieve anything. It only made him laugh, a rich sound that sent a shiver down her spine.

Aesling frowned and struggled more, but he only pinned her to the wall and gripped her chin in his firm, hard fingers. “You want out of here, yes?”

She nodded, relaxed and hoped he’d loosen his grip. He didn’t. But he also didn’t tighten it to the point that it inflicted pain. 

“What if I’m the only way out?”

As if she’d believe that. She eyed his belt, looking for any weapon she could use. Only one presented itself, and she knew with one glance that it wasn’t an option. The single blade, unsheathed and tucked through a belt loop, could be a way to free herself, but she couldn’t bring herself to touch it. It whispered to her of arcane things and darkness, of the Seelie and the Unseelie, and worst of all, of war and disaster. She let out a muted cry and wrenched her gaze away, only to meet the stranger’s yellow gaze again.

He gave her another of his feral grins and leans in closer. “I asked a question, and I expect an answer, please. What if I’m the only way out of here?”

“How can that be possible?”

“Look around you, little one. Do you see a luxurious castle with multiple entrances and exits for the servants like yourself?”

She glared at him. “I fail to see how that’s important. Just what are you driving at?”

He laughed. “That if you want to escape this cursed mansion where everything is dying along with your Queen’s power, you’ll come with me.” He leaned closer and ran his mouth along the curve of her ear. “It’s a simple choice. Starve to death here or take a single sip from my cup.”

~~~

That’s it for this week’s Work-In-Progress Wednesday, everyone! I hope you all enjoyed it. Have something you’re working on? Nanowrimo is under way for the month of November now, and this is part of the project I’m hoping to complete for it. Do any of you have a project for this year? If so, feel free to share about it in the comments!

Saturday Setup: Magic – Establishing Rules

Ariel Paiement

Introduction

This week’s discussion is about magic. What good would any discussion of fantasy do if you didn’t go over magic? Since most sub-genres of fantasy include magic to one degree or another, this is an important thing to cover. We’ll begin our discussion with a talk about establishing rules, and next week, we’ll go over different systems of magic.

Why Bother with Rules?

The first obvious reason for this is to avoid chaos. If a spell does one thing today and another tomorrow, you might have material for a hilarious comedy, but nothing would ever work out according to plan. Your characters could never really learn magic because nothing is ever the same on any given day. 

But there’s a larger reason. While it might be amusing to have a magic system that has no rules and where anything could happen at any time, readers expect stability. They expect writers to lay down the rules. Of course, you won’t just say right up front what those rules are, but gradually, as they see more and more use of magic in your story, they will figure out what is and is not possible. 

This, of course, means that you need to know the rules.

Establishing Rules

Now that we’ve covered the reason you need rules, let’s talk about establishing them. It pays to go through a little bit of planning before you start writing. Now, you don’t have to go crazy with it before you start writing. If you really love worldbuilding, then feel free to go through an extensive, in-depth process to create your magic system prior to writing, but if you’re the sort who isn’t keen on spending months or even weeks on this, don’t stress. You don’t have to. Don’t believe the lie that you need to put countless hours into this or any other aspect of world-buillding prior to writing. It simply isn’t the case.

However, you should take some time to think through the basic rules. How does the magic work? Is it a spell-based system? Do people inherently have an ability? Is it a combination of both? For example, on Alcardia where the Pathways series takes place, the system allows for both. Some people are born with magic inherently. These people can use on of a few areas of magic and only a very specific portion of it. Ie: a water mage might be able to manipulate water or he might be able to create it, not both. But there are also those who can’t use magic inherently at all, and these individuals use spells to remain competitive with those who can use magic. So you’re not locked into one way of doing things, but you do need to have a system, and you need to know what can and can’t happen in that system.

For example, if we take Alcardia’s system, I would need to have a very good reason for why someone would have an ability that isn’t related to earth, water, air, fire, mental, or physical magic. (As an aside, I do in fact have those who can wield darkness and light, so I had to have an explanation for it.) If I had a character who could do more than one thing with his element (such as create and manipulate water), I would have to have a really good explanation for it because that isn’t how the system works.

This will help to prevent you from going insane trying to remember all the things you’ve already done and trying to figure out where to go next in an unpredictable system. It gives you clear boundaries, and if you go outside of them, it forces you to have a good reason. As in, a very, very good reason because neither your story nor your reader can accept random breaks in the system rules just to accommodate what you think would be cool. That kind of addition is best saved for other magic systems based around that exception or for fiction pieces you wrote for your enjoyment with no intention of letting them see the light of day.

Consequences

Another point here, when you’re establishing rules, is to avoid creating a system with no give and take. Nothing is free. If your hero could use magic to solve every problem with no fear of consequences, then why wouldn’t he? And when he does, you lose your story or risk making it entirely unbelievable. So, every action should have some sort of consequence to it. That could be that if they try to go beyond a certain amount of energy, they tap into their life force and may die. Or maybe it’s that if they use it, it could take something away from them, something that they’ll never be able to choice for themselves. This could be anything from losing memories to losing something or someone they care about very deeply. But there has to be some consequence or risk that keeps the individuals in the story (at least, the good guys) from using magic to surmount every obstacle with ease.

An Important Note

Please notice that I haven’t told you how you should build your rules or what rules you can and can’t have. This is fantasy. As long as the system remains true to itself, you can do just about anything. The point I want to get across here is that if you’re using magic in your fantasy novel, you absolutely must have established rules to govern it. 

Conclusion

Magic is often an integral part of fantasy, so making sure that you have a system that works and has clear structure is an important part of planning and world-building for any fantasy novel that includes it. Take some time to think about how you might be able to limit and structure your world’s ability to use magic. Make sure you write it down though because you don’t want to lose it or forget what you set out for the system, particularly if the book is the beginning of a series or an entire saga of books that requires the use that system.

Flash Fiction Fridays – Unseelie

Ariel Paiement

This one is a bit of a one off from a world-building exercise I did. I’ll probably be writing a post about the method I used in a Thursday Technicalities, but that might be a bit in coming. I’m undecided on whether or not I’ll make a short story or novel out of this flash fiction, but we’ll see. Here you are!

~~~

I touch the flaking paint and peeling gold gilding of the doors, almost afraid of what might be behind them. But I also know it could be the only way out of here. I can’t go back down the dimly lit corridor I followed here, after all. So, I swallow the fear and press the door open just a crack, just enough to peek through.

The first thing I see is the man at the center of the room. The room itself is in shambles and looks to be empty aside from him. No noise is made, and I am certain I gave no indication of my presence. The door hinges didn’t make any noise earlier. But he knows I am here. He watches me from beneath long lashes, his irises a startling citrine. His clothing is immaculate, unlike the rest of the ballroom. A tailored suit and waistcoat with nice shoes. But his hair is unruly, giving him a wild look. And then he smiles at me, and I shiver. Out of fear or anticipation, I can’t say. Something about him both terrifies and warms me. 

The floor around him is dusty, and the light coming through the dingy window just behind him casts the edge of some kind of platform into sharp relief against the floor. Yet, somehow, he doesn’t cast a shadow. In that room of decay and despair, he fits in but also stands apart. His wild hair indicates a carelessness that the room’s occupants reflected in letting the curtains be eaten by moths and time unheeded, but his clothes are immaculate. An enigma in every way, even if he did appear to be somewhat at home in the otherwise empty room.

I crack the door a little more and peer past him at the strange crack in the wall that’s emitting an unearthly glow. What could it be? Some sort of portal, maybe? It doesn’t look safe, whatever it is. I can’t see past the light no matter how hard I strain, but I catch some chords of an ethereal, haunted melody drifting through the room to where I’m standing.

“Will you hide there all day, daughter of the shadows?” His voice is silky and sultry, meant entirely to charm.

I shiver and shake my head, backing away from the door. Something about this feels wrong. I never get the chance to run. He has me in his grasp the second I turn away from the doors, determined to find another way. His musk and pine scent envelops me, both soothing and frightening at the same time. How is that even possible?

I struggle against his grip, but he easily pins me to the wall just outside the dimly-lit ballroom.

“You want out of here, yes?”

I nod, go limp and hope he’ll loosen his grip. He doesn’t.

“What if I’m the only way?”

My gaze drops to his belt, searching for any way I might fend him off. His belt holds a single blade, unsheathed and tucked through a loop. But one look tells me all I need to know. I won’t touch it. It whispers to me of arcane things and darkness, of the Seelie and the Unseelie, and worst of all, of war and disaster. Shuddering, I look away. It gives no sign that it might harm its owner or even me, but something about it is simply unsettling.

The man gives me a feral grin. “I asked a question. What if I am your only escape?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That if you want to escape this cursed mansion, you will have to come to me.” He leans closer until his lips brush the shell of my ear. “It’s a simple choice. Die here or take just a single sip from my cup.”

“Your cup?” I peer at the wall across from us as if it might contain answers and try not to notice how closely his body presses against mine. 

“I left it in the ballroom when I came to fetch you.” He pulls away and grabs my wrist, tugging me through the doors. “You can either drink from it or starve to death in this place.”

“Why isn’t there an escape?”

His grip tightens. “Because of fate. Or because of whatever it is that will make you feel better about what is going to happen.”

My gut clenches. I stare at the object that is resting under the unfiltered brilliance of the strange crack in the wall. An odd liquid that looks silver in nature swirls about in the cup. “You want me to drink that? It looks like it might kill me.”

He forces me to my knees before kneeling beside me. “It won’t. Just one sip. One tiny sip, and you’ll be freed.”

I reach out and pick up the cool metal cup. “Just one?”

“Just one.”

Sucking in a deep breath, I lift the cup to my lips and take a tiny sip of the liquid. At first, a sweet and spicy tang fills my mouth. Then the bitterness hits, and I gag, choking on what I swallowed. It burns all the way down my throat and sets a fire in my belly. The warmth isn’t unpleasant, but I don’t like it all the same. “What is this stuff?”

He gives me a mysterious smile, and the liquid in the cup begins to change to gas, billowing out of the cup and flowing over me. It seeps into my pores and invades my nose, drying my throat and leaving the same cloying taste of sweet, spicy, and bitter on my tongue. “W-what have you done?”

He laughed and laced his fingers through mine as every nerve in my body burned and ached. “Made you mine.”

~~~

That’s it for this post, everyone! If you have something you’d like to see for future Flash Fiction Fridays, feel free to leave the suggestion in the comments below!

Shifter – A Lesson In Story Building

Ariel Paiement

It’s been quite a while since I’ve done a review on here. In fact, I haven’t done one since the first one I did for Hunter by Joanna White. (If you haven’t read that yet, you can read it here.)

As with the review of Hunter, I’m going to split my review into two sections. The first is intended for my readers who simply want a new book to read. If you’re not interested in spoilers or seeing the craft in the book picked apart to learn from it, then this first review is for you! However, if you’re interested as a writer trying to learn what works well in writing (or what doesn’t in some cases with books), the second review is for you.

Let’s get started!

Reader’s Review

As a reader, I’ll be honest in saying that I enjoyed Hunter more. That said, I did eventually get into Shifter, and I really enjoyed it once I did. It just took me a bit. Part of the problem for me, personally, was that I was so attached to Jared and Averella from Hunter that I wasn’t really ready for a move to a new set of characters or a new ship. That said, I believe that Joanna has since published a short story, Sightless, that helps to give a bit more final ending to Jared and Averella’s story, at least for the time being. Had I read this before Shifter, I may have had an easier time transitioning. 

That said, I did enjoy the book. It made me smile, laugh, and cry. I’m not a big crier usually, so the fact that the book could make me cry is a good indication that it really got me invested in the characters. The struggles the characters went through really resonated with me, and I was rooting for them the whole way. I don’t want to spoil anything for anyone, but I will say that I thoroughly enjoyed the action scenes, the entire premise of different kinds of shifters, and the way she moved through the book. The plot took a variety of twists and turns that I didn’t expect, and the end was definitely no exception.

The end wasn’t my favorite. Be warned ahead of time that it’s a bit bittersweet. It definitely made me sad. I wouldn’t say it spoiled the book for me because there was clear evidence that it was only the beginning of a bigger story, but it took a while for me to accept how it ended. Then again, if a book can pull at your heartstrings enough to make you feel pain, joy, or anger, the author has done their job well. Assuming they’ve elicited the emotional response they were going for, that is! I feel the author knew what she was doing and wrote the ending the way she did intentionally, so I don’t feel it really took away from the book.

Overall, I would definitely recommend this to people who enjoyed Hunter or who are just looking for clean fantasy to read. As a bonus for those who are Christian, the book does have strong Christian ethical themes and a morally solid message. If you’re looking for that, this won’t disappoint there. Even if you aren’t, the story is still an enjoyable read.

Writer’s Review

**Spoiler Alert: If you want to read this book before you pick it apart to learn how to improve your own writing or if you just want to read the book for sheer enjoyment, do not read any further! Read the book first and then read this or just don’t read this at all. That said, if you aren’t intending to read the book, already have, or don’t care about spoilers, welcome to the section for those of you looking to learn more about the craft!**

So, Shifter had some interesting things in it that never showed up in Hunter. I wasn’t really expecting them, to be honest. I’d read other stuff by Joanna, but apparently, I hadn’t read anything that had these elements prior to reading Shifter. So, I have a few interesting points to pick out for you all today!

Languages

The first really big thing I noticed in Shifter that wasn’t present in Hunter was the use of another language. In Shifter, Joanna builds her own language for the Shifter clans (mostly for the dragon Shifters). This was entirely unexpected, frankly. She’s put awesome bits of world-building into her work before, but, as I said, there were elements I hadn’t seen before, and this was one of them.

This one was a bit of both positive and negative for me. On the positive side, I absolutely loved the level of realism it lent to the story. I mean, we have multiple languages in real life, so why not in fantasy on another planet? I appreciated that Joanna took the time to create a very consistent-sounding language to incorporate. She gave the words life and meaning, and she used similar or common sounds to help make the words feel like they could be part of a real language. This is a technique that I noted was useful in my post on building languages on Saturday Setups.

But here’s the negative side of it. The words’ sounds weren’t intuitive. This made it difficult to decide how a name or a word ought to be pronounced. Now, I know that as writers, we have to give our readers some creative license. We have to understand that readers won’t pronounce things like we do all the time. But the hope is they can get close. For Shifter, it took me over half the book to even get close to remember how different letter combinations should sound.

In Joanna’s favor, though, was the fact that she did have a main character who didn’t know the language. So, the male lead, Beroan, had to explain how things were pronounced and tell Nsi, our female lead, how to say words or what those words meant. This helped alleviate some of the frustration of not knowing how to pronounce the sometimes odd combinations of letters. I did appreciate that.

On the whole, I would say that this technique is one to use carefully. As you can see, Joanna’s use of it had some downsides but also some upsides. I don’t think she made a poor choice to include it, but when she built it, she might have, in hindsight, wanted to make the words a little more reader-friendly.

So that’s something all of us should keep in mind if we choose to create languages to become a part of the world-building. Use combinations of sounds that the reader can at least guess at. Use pronunciations that readers can get close to by looking at the word.

And if you aren’t going to do that, provide a glossary in the back with the foreign-sounding words and their meanings so that readers who might be bugged by this can have a guide to look at. (Trust me… As a reader who can get frustrated by an inability to figure out a pronunciation, a pronunciation and meaning guide is something I greatly appreciate.)

Ending With a Bang

Okay, so I understand why Joanna wrote the ending the way she did, but as a reader, the ending she used in Shifter didn’t really leave me satisfied initially. As a writer, I understand that it was a structurally sound ending, but emotionally, that didn’t really compute. What Joanna did with Shifter was to end it with Beroan, the dragon-shifter male lead, dying in the final boss fight. This, of course, broke Nsi’s heart. Mine too, frankly.

I was not expecting this ending at all! I mean, I expected injuries. Even severe injuries. But not this. An ending like this could majorly backfire because readers get attached to your main characters. Beroan, in particular, was a very likeable character. So this is another technique that I advise using with caution. You don’t want your reader to see the ending coming, but you may not want to go to these extremes. In some cases, such as Joanna’s, there’s a good reason and one that’s called for. But if you don’t have that good reason, don’t go here.

Here’s why. A reader who sees this ending and is upset can still look back through Shifter and recognize the signs that this was the ending. They didn’t see them while reading, but they see them now. If those reasons are not good, clear, and strong, the reader is going to feel cheated, not just upset. As writers, it’s our job to deliver an ending that sticks with the reader in some way. But if it’s a sad or bad ending, we have an extra responsibility to give the reader justification for that. Joanna has, I feel, done this in Shifter, but it could easily have gone the other way too. Make sure you think carefully before utilizing this technique!

Conclusion

Shifter was a great novel in my opinion. I would highly recommend reading it for anyone who likes clean fiction with Biblical themes and morally upright principles. You can find Shifter here or follow Joanna White on Amazon here.

Flash Fiction Fridays: Proposal

Ariel Paiement

Hi, everyone! This week, we have a scene with Dhiabhan and Rhubhian from Bane of Ashkarith!

~~~

How long had it been since he’d been this nervous? He couldn’t even remember. No one, not even his father, had the capacity to do this to him. Only her. He tugged at the collar of his jacket with a sigh and exited the shop with his purchase tucked safely into his pocket. Would she like what he’d bought her? Would she refuse it? Gods, he hoped not.

His finger ran over the cool wood of the box, and he smiled. Neither one of them had ever imagined there would be a day when they wouldn’t have to be slave and master, prince and subject. He certainly hadn’t thought a day would come when he was free to love her without fear of losing her because of his weakness. But that day had come.

He kicked at the cobblestones of the path, listened to the tinkle of the wind through the wind chimes, and watched the carriages hurdle past down the sewage-laden streets. What a glorious day to be alive! Hopefully Rhubhian would echo that sentiment when he showed her what he’d bought.

He turned the box over and over in his pocket, fingers playing over the polished surface and the cold silver clasp that kept it firmly locked shut. His grin broadened as the airfield came into sight between the stone and mortar houses of the tradesmen living on the edges of town. The sun spilled over amber waves of grass dotted with purple and red autumnal flowers. He stopped by the edge of the fields and picked a few with pursed lips.

She might refuse his gift, but she’d never turn down flowers. Especially not these ones. He sucked in a breath of the freedom-laden air and quickened his pace. He nearly pranced down the pathway in the field as he approached the tents, but he forced himself to stay calm and walk at a pace that matched his usual brisk walk.

His men watched him with knowing grins and winks. He scowled at them, but even their knowledge of what was meant to be a secret didn’t dampen his mood. Why should it? Things couldn’t be better in his world, and if she didn’t refuse, he might even be forced to revise that opinion.

He flung the tent flap of his home aside and ducked inside.

Rhubhian swayed gently as she worked at tidying up the tent, her soft voice lifted in some song from her homeland. He paused at the door, drinking in her movements and the cadence of her song. She’d never sung while they were in his father’s court, and since leaving, he’d determined he would never let anyone steal away something she so obviously enjoyed again. “Ru?”

She stopped humming and spun to face him, dipping her head to hide the huge smile breaking out over her face. “You’re back, Eras.”

He strode to her and lifted her by the waist to swing her around before settling her petite frame against his. “Indeed I am. And I come bearing gifts.” He produced the flowers from his pocket and handed them to her.

She smiled and stood on her toes to press her lips to his. “They’re beautiful. Thank you.”

He cleared his throat, the nerves returning. “Yes, well. I have something else to give you, actually.”

She bit her lip. “You seem uncertain. Is something wrong?”

He shook his head then paused and shrugged. “Not yet. Maybe not at all. It depends on what you say.”

She frowned. “What I say?”

Dhiabhan nodded and slowly pulled the wooden box from his pocket, drawing her in with one arm to show her. “I have a very important question to ask you.”

“And it has to do with that box?”

He smiled and pressed a kiss to her temple. “Perceptive as always. It does.”

“What’s the gift, then? The box or what’s in it?”

“What’s in it.” He flipped the latch open and lifted the lid on the sandalwood box with its gold inlay and silver filigree. “In my culture, we had a tradition a long time ago. Long before we began to disrespect our woman and treat them as lesser beings. As the tradition went, the men presented these to their lovers in the hopes that they might…” His voice choked off, and he stared down at the glinting ring with its blue face and delicate silver design work. “In the hopes that they might do their men the honor of wedding them.”

Rhubhian sucked in a breath and reached out to touch the ring with trembling fingers. “And this? This is the question you wanted to ask me?”

He placed the box in her hands and closed her fingers around it. Then he enveloped her hands in his and drew her close. “Yes. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife, Ru?”

Her smile veiled with tears, she laughed. “It is long overdue, is it not?”

“I apologize for that, my love.” Dhiabhan squeezed her hands. “Had I been free of my conniving father, I would have brought the question to you a long time ago.”

She smiled and nodded. “Well, I suppose I can accept that explanation. And yes, Eras. I will marry you.”

He stared down at her with a soft smile on his lips, cupped her face in his hands, and marveled at how such a delicate creature could place her trust and her heart in his work-worn hands. He really didn’t deserve such great love. But whether he deserved it or not, he had it, and he didn’t plan on letting it go. He pressed his forehead to hers with a wide smile. “Thank you. This day can’t get any better now, thanks to you.”

“Glad to help.”

He kissed her gently and helped her put the ring on. For a moment, he stood there, admiring the way it glimmered in the lights from the lamps. She was his. Really, truly his. For forever, until death did them part. And he couldn’t have been more ecstatic.

~~~

That’s it for this week! Have something you’d like to see in this section of the blog? Feel free to leave suggestions below or send them to my email address from the contact page.

Work-In-Progress Wednesdays #23

Ariel Paiement

This week, I have an excerpt from the most recent section of Pathway of the Moon. I’m already finishing up Part Four of Six. I’m really excited about how much progress I’ve made, and I can’t wait to start on the sequel. I’m slowly working on planning that. At any rate… Enjoy!

~~~

ALRIAN huddled in the reeds on the shoreline. The water lapped at her bare feet, and she shivered. The moon hung full and heavy overhead, a silent testament to the remaining time. Too much of it. Something snapped in the distance, and she retreated further into the reeds. Was it Shiador? The noise quieted. Not Shiador, then.

She let out a soundless sigh. She’d hid well. He wouldn’t find her if she stayed here. But she couldn’t hide until dawn anymore like they’d planned. With Leo and Deira’s arrest, she had to find her way to them. But she didn’t know where they were, and she had to figure it out without being caught by Shiador. Thankfully, she was certain he was searching obvious places. He still believed he was in possession of superior intellect, so why would he start in the good hiding spots? A dumb girl like her obviously wouldn’t be smart enough to prepare or think through her hiding places. And the women he was used to would never break the rules the men laid out.

After their last run in, he should already know she wasn’t anything like the women in camp, but she wouldn’t complain about how dense he was. It was working in her favor at the moment. She listened a moment longer, then stretched her stiff limbs in preparation for the swim back to the mainland. Her clothes had barely dried from her last swim.

She sighed.

Swimming with them was possible, of course, but was it really wise? The cold water and damp cloth against her skin for hours more could slow her down and make her sick if the air got any colder. She groaned softly and began to peel the thin clothing off. Bundling it together, she used the thin sash from the dress to tie it to her shoulders for the swim. She’d wait for it to dry again before she redressed. It was barely any protection against the wind anyway.

Then she took a deep breath and plunged into the water. The cold crashed into her, spread through her bones. But she pulled on her ashtra and forced her limbs to keep moving through the moonlit waters.

Ten minutes later, she dragged herself out of the water and onto the bank. Pushing her sopping wet hair out of her face, she sprawled out and took slow, shallow breaths to slow her heart rate. Best to take a moment to recover now while she knew Shiador wasn’t anywhere too close by.

While she rested against the cool, damp grass, she took a moment to think. Where would the Pathway be? Would Leo and Deira be there or would they have escaped already? She didn’t have any answers, though if they were still at the Pathway, it was probably because Leo was incapacitated. And they couldn’t be near any source of water because Amadeira would have been able to use that against them.

The wind played over her bare, damp skin, and she shivered. Somewhere in the distance, a fox released a sharp alarm cry and another one picked it up. She pushed herself to her feet and crept into the bushes. The sounds were quite far away, but who knew what had alarmed the animals. She veered away from the sound and headed for the camp. It was probably the last place Shiador would think to look, and it would be the first place she might find clues to the Path’s whereabouts.

Something hooted, and she jumped. The soft flutter of wings in the night met her attentive ear. She sighed. Nothing but a bird. If she made it out of this alive, she swore she would never spend the night alone in a creepy forest again. And she’d definitely make sure she stayed armed if she ever ended up the hunted instead of the hunter.

Speaking of arms, hadn’t Leo left a few knives and other weapons back in the little cottage? If she could make it there, she’d at least have some measure of protection on her if Shiador ran across her. Better that than nothing, and with the element of surprise, she might even stand a chance. And while she was there, maybe she could find a warm change of clothes.

She glanced up into the foliage overhead. The moon shone as bright as ever. She heaved a sigh and began the trudge back toward the camp. The sounds of the animals in the forest enveloped her, and she let them guide her through the forest safely. If she heard cries of alarm or disturbances nearby or in the distance, she stayed away from that area.

But the forest was large, and in the moonlight, it looked far different than it did during the day. Going a different direction from usual also hadn’t helped. Was she even on the right track? The forest began to thin, and a path cleared for her. She frowned and followed the trail. 

Things began to look more familiar. There was the old twisted tree that had been hit by lightning. And there was the stone with odd carving on it. Her shoulders sagged in relief. She slowed her pace and moved from the cover of one tree to the next. If anyone was watching for her, hopefully this would keep her out of their sight. She paused on the edge of the woods. Would anyone be watching for her? Would they suspect she might try to return to the cabin in search of her friends?

She peered around the trunk of a tree. No lights lit the cottage from within, and everything was quiet outside. Shiador had hardly been quiet in his initial pursuit of her, and she doubted he would bother doing so now. He wanted her running and terrified out of her mind so she wouldn’t think straight. Too bad for him. She wasn’t the type to do that. Maybe if he’d met her before she joined the military, he might have had more luck.

She rolled her eyes. As if. He’d only have had more luck because she wasn’t trained to deal with situations like this back then. She slipped out from behind the tree and hurried to the cottage. No one stopped her, and no one tried to accost her. The place was deserted. She turned the knob on the back door. The handle turned with ease, and she pushed inside.

Nothing moved or made a sound in the cottage’s interior. She eased the door shut behind her and hurried toward her trunk in the living room. She stumbled over an overturned cushion from the couch and stubbed her toe on the edge of a table leg. The search party Kiarhsu had assembled had left no stone unturned, and it seemed they had also left the house in disarray when they’d left. She slowed down and squinted to make out the shadowy shapes by the moonlight streaming in the window. If only she could turn on a light. But that was too risky.

She groped around beside the love seat until she located the trunk she’d thrown her clothes and weapons into. Opening the lid, she sighed. At least her things were still in the trunk. Someone had folded everything neatly, and she guessed Deira must have done so while she was trying not to go mad with stress before she and Leo were moved to the Path. She dug through it and laid out a warm shirt, loose fitting pants, a belt, and her weapons. Then she yanked the soaking wet dress the camp’s women had adorned her in off her back. The cursed thing looked like a shapeless, sad mess now. She wadded it up even more and threw it into a corner. Infernal invention. She dragged the shirt over her head and then tugged on her pants with a grim smile. Much better suited for what she was doing. Traipsing about the woods naked or clothed in a flimsy dress meant to slow her down was Rith’s own curse. No woman deserved to be chased through the forest by a madman in clothing that was designed to slow her flight.

And besides. She had another mission to perform. Besides evading Shiador, that was. She strapped her sword on and strode to the front door this time. A quick peek out the windows confirmed that no one was lurking around in wait, so she pushed the door open inch-by-inch until she could squeeze out. Shutting it behind her, she scanned the immediate surroundings. Nothing.

The birds and other night animals were creating the usual soft buzz of noise in the background. Nothing had come this way recently besides her, and they knew she was not a threat. Her shoulders sagged. That was one problem out of her way. The next problem was a bigger one: would the women be willing to help her?

She squared her shoulders. Only one way to find out.

~~~

Thanks for reading! What are you guys up to? Feel free to share in the comments below. I’d love to see what all of you are working on right now.

Saturday Setups: Resources

Ariel Paiement

Introduction

Resources are an important part of worldbuilding. Most cities are built near commonly needed resources like large bodies of water or places with rich fields for farming. Civilization doesn’t get far if there isn’t enough resource-rich land to support a growing metropolis. This has held true in history, and it still holds true in fantasy or any other type of world-building. So, let’s take a look at some of the resources your civilization might build up around.

Water

This one is a bit of an obvious one, but most cities don’t build where there isn’t an accessible water source. This might be a river, a major oasis, or a place with rich places to build wells. But a city must have water to survive, so no city will grow up to be a major metropolis without water to support its people.

Precious Metals

This one isn’t as obvious, but cities may build up around places where mining for precious metals and ore can be done. This gives them a good trading resource, and it also gives them the ability to make their own currency. As a result, this is a resource that civilizations founding new cities may look for. Even if they started out as just a settlement in an area with a vein of precious metal ore, the presence of that resource often results in growth later on. 

Precious Stones

Similarly, precious stones can be another reason a place becomes home to a city. People are willing to pay a great deal to gain precious stones for any purpose from jewelry to currency for big ticket items. They can be used to trade, and in fantasy worlds, they may even be able to hold some sort of special magical ability. As this is the case, depending on what uses the world as a whole has for this resource, cities can grow up around it quite easily.

Salt

This one is another less-than-intuitive option, but some cities can grow up around salt flats because salt is a commodity and also essential for preserving food in societies with no way of refrigerating. And if you have a world where witchcraft is a thing, then maybe salt is a special ingredient for them too. It all depends. The possibilities open to you with this resource are endless, and the more uses this resource has, the more likely it is someone will want to build a city near a location with salt flats.

Wood

Another important resource is wood. Building in an area that has lots of forest offers the opportunity to build structures that might be impossible to build without it. It also allows for carving and craftsmanship that couldn’t be accomplished with other materials. It allows for the creation of paper as well, if the people living there are advanced enough to know the process for creating it with trees. Regardless, at any stage, building a city in or near a forest can provide the city with valuable resources they might not be able to access otherwise.

Wild Game

If your civilization is a hunting community, this one is especially important. The presence of various types of animals provides them with both food and furs and pelts to trade. As can be seen in American history, the fur trade can be quite lucrative, so even if your civilization isn’t mainly hunter-gatherer-based, it may still grow around the fur trading capacities the location offers.

Farmable Land

This is a big one for civilizations that are settling down and trying to stay in one place. Often, the need for land that’s arid and good for crops leads to destruction of the forests in those areas so that farmers can plant their crops. This also offers a huge area of trade because farmable land allows people to grow so many different things. If that city or small kingdom owns most of the farmable land, they may become quite wealthy by trading their crops for other things neighboring cities and kingdoms have that they can’t produce for themselves. The other good thing about farmable land, of course, is that it provides a way to keep various herd animals, which can go a long way toward sustaining the civilization.

Conclusion

These are just a few of the many resources available, of course. However, they’re some of the common ones that cities and kingdoms may grow up around, so they’re worth mentioning. Have one you’d like to add? Feel free to leave it in the comments below!  

Flash Fiction Fridays: Orian

Ariel Paiement

This week’s flash fiction is about Dairdra and Orian from the Throne of War series. Enjoy!

~~~

Dairdra ran her fingers through the inch of warm water in the tub, watched the hot water cascade from the tap. How long had it been since she’d really enjoyed life? And how long had it been since she’d laughed so much in a day? With a man, no less. 

She’d thought the part of her that could enjoy a man’s company like that was long dead. After all, it hadn’t made an appearance since Crypt’s death four years ago. She’d resumed her duties as Queen and had taken onto her shoulders the role her husband should’ve had, and no one had questioned the pieces of her heart that were missing. Some days, those pieces, which were firmly planted in the Second Life when Crypt died, warred with the pieces of her heart that were still solidly attached to this world. 

No one had pushed her to pursue a match in the first year or so, but now everyone kept hinting at it, kept introducing her to different eligible bachelors. Why not? She was old enough to wed and finally hand over her extra duties to someone fit to shoulder them. But did she want to?

Not particularly. The reasons for that were a jumble though. First, she didn’t want to marry after losing Crypt. Her insecurities and fears of losing any new lover were too great. Second, she wasn’t sure if she would be happy taking the more traditional roles a Queen took, and she was certain that few of the men she’d met so far would be happy if she wanted equality in ruling the kingdom. 

But now all of those reasons were in a tangled mess at the bottom of her heart. Orian–the dark-haired, blue-eyed devil–was the man responsible for shaking her foundations and causing her to question what she really wanted. He had brought to life parts of her that she thought were well and truly dead. Somehow, though, he had done the impossible and had raised her battered heart’s hopes. 

She pulled her hand out of the bathwater with a groan. Claudius would love this. He’d be ringing the wedding bells with no further ado if she told him Orian had caught her eye. In fact, she was fairly certain her head councilor had been just waiting for her to take a shine to the prince since his arrival four months ago. Of course, if she was to allow Orian the chance to publicly court her, as he’d requested, she’d have to get the Council’s permission, and that meant informing Claudius.

She shook her head and began to strip. Well, it was an issue that would have to be dealt with eventually. She needed a partner and someone who would help her shoulder the burden. The crown was a heavy, lonely duty, and though she loved her people dearly, she was finally ready to admit that she wanted someone beside her. Just so long as that someone didn’t think she’d be happy with being demoted to silent supporter and mother. But she was fairly sure Orian wasn’t the sort to react to her that way. And if he was, she could always kick him back through the Gate he’d been sent through.

That was it, then. In the morning, she would tell the Council she intended to give Orian a chance. Sighing, she settled down into the bath. Until then, she would let the warm water soothe her troubled mind and her fearful heart. No sense in losing a good night’s sleep over this.

~~~

I hope you all enjoyed it! If you have something you’d like to see or a character you want to see more about in the flash fiction Friday posts, feel free to leave the suggestion in the comments or send me an email! I’m always open to hearing what you all are interested in reading.

Work-In-Progress Wednesdays #22

Ariel Paiement

This week’s WIP Wednesday is an excerpt from the latest chapter of Pathway of the Moon.

~~~

LEO tried to catch a glimpse of Foren as he and Amadeira were dragged from the cabin into the woods beyond. The moon shone down in silver-white on the ground and dappled the faces of the antagonizers who surrounded him. Not a friendly face in sight. Had Foren given up on helping now that their plans had been blown apart? Or had he too been discovered and locked away to await sentencing?

His mind drifted to Alrian for a minute. She’d be undergoing the preparations of an Equinox Bride right now. Hardly anything enjoyable. But he’d have to leave her safety to her now because he couldn’t do anything for her. He wasn’t even sure he could do anything for himself without risking Amadeira. That wasn’t an option, and fighting his way free would leave her vulnerable. He couldn’t protect her and himself while going on the offensive. Not against this many enemies.

So he let them drag him along without making a fuss. Beside him, Amadeira was silent, but when he looked over, he caught the glimmer of her tears on her cheeks. She glanced at him and tried to offer a smile, but it fell seconds later. He groaned. If his hands were free right now, he would take her in his arms and wipe those tears away. He’d comfort her until she no longer wept or felt fear. But his arms weren’t free, and he had no comfort to offer. Not when he didn’t have the first clue how they were supposed to survive this.

He’d have to make it up as he went along. There wasn’t exactly another option at the moment. He’d reevaluate their position when they reached the Pathway. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe Kiarhsu would only have him flogged instead of putting him to death. They needed his blood, but they didn’t need to kill him for that.

Which brought up another problem. He didn’t want them to open the Pathway at all. And his blood could open it. They weren’t likely to give him a say in what was done with the blood spilling from his veins later on when they bled him under the full moon. Shame, really. But what villain would give his hostage a chance to voice an opinion? It just didn’t work out well. Best to keep them quiet.

He swallowed back a laugh. What was he doing? He should be thinking of ways to escape, not letting his mind ramble to every absurd, obvious thing it could find to dwell upon. This wouldn’t help them out at all. He forced his mind back to the task at hand. Forming a plan with very little to go on.

Kiarhsu waved at his men, and Leo received a boot to the back. He stumbled forward, tripped over a dip in the path, and dropped to his knees. The men hauled him up roughly and lifted him onto a horse where he was promptly tied to the saddle. No escape there, it seemed. Not that it would do him much good to escape without Amadeira. And Kiarhsu knew it, Rith take him! He scowled down at the man who had ruined everything in just under a day. How much longer until he could be rid of the pest?

Right. Not until he actually had a plan. Well, that was frustrating, but it couldn’t be helped. He slouched down in the saddle with a grumpy growl, but he didn’t give the men eyeing him warily any cause to hit him or bring him back into line with brute force. Best to save the fighting for a moment when he could actually achieve freedom with Amadeira at his side. This was not such a time.

~~~

That’s it for this week! What have you guys been working on? Feel free to share it in the comments.

Sunday Sub-Genres: Grimdark Fantasy

Ariel Paiement

Introduction

While we’ve examined some very dark, gritty versions of fantasy, this sub-genre is one of the darkest. It is considered a sub-genre of fantasy that is notorious for its grittiness and darkness. However, whatever the views people have of it, the genre has become more popular since George R.R. Martin’s wildly successful book A Song of Ice and Fire. So let’s take a look.

Defining Grimdark Fantasy

Pinning down a definition for grimdark fantasy is difficult. For some, it is a byword for fantasy that is unnecessarily dark. For those who enjoy the genre, they would openly admit that grimdark fantasy is both grim and dark with a lot of grit, but not necessarily without reason. Many times, grimdark is meant to explore the psychology behind those sword-toting heroes and the dark, harsh reality of the world. As a result of showing the grittier side of life, the stories get a bad rap for being brutal, dark, and sometimes depraved. While that may be true of some grimdark, the genre does not require writers to include unnecessary gore or wickedness in order to be grimdark. For those of you who want to remain sensitive to the sensibilities of others while still being true to the reality of life, grimdark can still hold a place for you. The genre is more focused on showing the truth about reality in a fantasy setting and showing that real people don’t always do things for the right moral reason, even when their action may be good in the eyes of others. This is reality, and the fact that you’re writing fantasy doesn’t necessitate keeping everything fairy-tale sparkly (well, Disney version of the fairytales, anyway. The real ones can, themselves, be more grimdark in style than you’d expect.).

Writing Grimdark Fantasy

Since it’s a bit difficult to pin down what grimdark is, let’s take a look at what readers of the genre look for in grimdark.  These are elements commonly found in grimdark that you can use to give your book the sub-genre’s unique flavor for readers of the sub-genre.

Morally Ambiguous Characters

In real life, while there are some things that are morally clear as right or wrong, there are things that aren’t so clear. And even if some things are morally black and white, some people may not see them that way even if they should. Grimdark is all about characters who struggle to figure out what moral black and white are in their situations. This manifests in the question of “why” they did what they did. Why did the knight save the princess? Did he do it because it was the right thing to do or because he wanted something out of it? Was it struggle to decide what to do and whether or not it was worth risking life and limb for this woman? That’s just one example of how moral ambiguity can manifest itself, but the main point is that your characters are just like real people: they struggle to know what is morally right and wrong throughout the novel. Not on every issue, perhaps, but they’ll have their moments.

Messed Up Characters

This one is not necessarily a must for grimdark, but it’s certainly common. Not to be confused with morally confused characters, the messed up characters are the ones who truly are on the side of immorality. They aren’t making mistakes, and they’re probably not confused about how evil what they’re doing is. They act in their own interests every time, and if they leads to a “good” act, great. But you can rest assured that, if they look like a saint, it’s only because it benefits them somehow. They’re wolves in sheep’s clothing. Be aware that if you have a main character like this, which isn’t unheard of in this sub-genre, readers may feel betrayed when they discover the MC isn’t who they assumed he was. This means that you have to be careful in how you reveal the character’s true nature. However, this has been done with great effect and without losing readers, so I wouldn’t say this should discourage you from trying.

Pure Naturalism

With this one, we go back to the motivations we were discussing. Many times, grimdark uses emotional drivers or goals of the characters to drive action. People do all sorts of the things in the name of emotion or a goal they want badly enough. The actions themselves can look good or bad, but the motivations underneath them may not match the appearance of the behavior. Most often, selfishness is a motivation in grimdark fantasy. In this style of grimdark, there is no right or wrong, good or evil. Only what gets the character closer to what they want. This isn’t a requirement to write grimdark. You could just as easily flip this around and have a character motivated by a good goal who does awful things trying to achieve it instead of a character motivated by pure selfishness. Either way, a character following this motto of grimdark will act purely on what will get him closer to the goal, not based on whether the action itself is good or bad.

Tight Narrative Voice

This is one aspect of grimdark that really is a must. A tight narrative voice allows the reader to experience the world through the eyes of the viewpoint character. They don’t get a broad view with an impartial narrator because grimdark is all about the character and his characterization, so naturally, the focus will be with the character. This means that using deep point-of-view, which we will discuss next week on Thursday Technicalities, is a really great writing technique to use for grimdark fantasy.

Plot Complexity and Characterization

These two generally go together in this sub-genre because the plot is moderately complex by itself, but highly complex when you start introducing morally ambiguous, manipulative characters. Grimdark is a sub-genre that is focused mostly on the characters. The plot may be action-oriented, but there will be many twists and turns that you wouldn’t find in other action-oriented plots simply because the characters are capable of anything, just as humans are in real life.

Which leads to another point on the characterization. Grimdark often gets a bad rap because anything goes, no matter how dark and depraved. But here’s the reason why that’s the case: grimdark writers know that humanity is capable of unspeakable evil, and they’re bent on making the reader face a flawed humanity. In some ways, they have a more realistic view of humanity in their writing than those writing high fantasy with sparkly clean characters do. While I don’t advocate gratuitous violence, grimdark definitely has an aspect to it that’s raw and real, which I do advocate in characterization. However, this sort of characterization that forces the reader to view humanity as inherently flawed, is not popular in the lighter sub-genres of fantasy. It has, instead, found its home in grimdark fantasy, which is the grittiest of the fantasy sub-genres. There are no knights in shining armor here, or if there are, they’ve got an unbelievable number of skeletons hidden away in their closets. There is no hero to sweep in and save the day because everyone is flawed, and no one is truly a hero.

Dystopian Setting

This one sort of speaks for itself. Most grimdark fantasy is written in a dystopian setting. The degree to which it is dystopian can vary, but the setting must be dystopian for the book to really fit in with grimdark fantasy. This is actually a fairly common thread through most of the darker sub-genres of fantasy. Not all, of course. But many of them feature dystopian settings because the settings work so well with the content.

Dark Endings

Finally, grimdark doesn’t have good or happy endings. If things work out in the favor of one character or another, you can bet that someone somewhere isn’t happy, and that’s the cue for more bloodshed and violence in most cases. So, really, the books are highly unpredictable. You never know what will happen, and the only thing you can guarantee is that everyone will end the story unhappy for one reason or another. Given this and the bleak sense of humor the sub-genre often employs, it isn’t for everyone. If you like happy endings more, this is not a genre you are going to enjoy reading, and since you have to read it to write it well, you should probably steer clear of it.

Conclusion

Grimdark fantasy is a tough sub-genre to write and to read. Its audience is smaller because of the gritty, violent, and depressing nature of the writing. However, for those looking for fiction that takes a real, hard look at what humanity is like underneath all of the various facades it puts up, grimdark is a great place to start. While it may have an overly cynical view of humanity sometimes, readers and writers will come away from it with an understand of just how flawed humanity is.

Additional Reading and Resources

**Because of the nature of grimdark fantasy and how few of these books I have actually looked at in any detail, I do not recommend any of this reading material for children under the age of 18. Please exercise discretion on the books for this. The articles are intended for writers of the genre, so those, with the exception of some language, should be safe enough for teens to read.**

Matt Larkin’s article on grimdark

Mythic Scribes’ article on grimdark fantasy for writers and readers

George R.R. Martin’s Game of Thrones

Steven Erikson’s Gardens of the Moon

Mark Lawrence’s Prince of Fools

Luke Scull’s The Grim Company