christian living – The Fantasy Nook

Sunday Stories – Set-Apart Living Pt. 2

Introduction

Last time on Sunday Stories, we talked about set-apart living and what it is and is not. This week’s focus will be on how we can go about a set-apart life practically. It does us no good to know what something means if we don’t also know how to utilize what we know, so this second piece is an indispensable part of the discussion.

What Does Set-Apart Living Mean Practically?

Set-apart living is going to look a little different in practicality for each of us. For me, God has nudged me to eliminate certain books that are likely to contain content of an impure nature and to spend more time listening to or reading biographies and autobiographies of Christians who did live a set-apart life to Christ. The reading content I have removed led only to temptations to sully my mind and soul, which should be an inner sanctuary for my Savior. However subtle the impurity and however “clean” the immorality’s nature is compared to the worst the world can offer, books that are heavy in this content or that are focused on it present the encouragement to sin. So, as Scripture says to lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily besets us, God drew me to eliminating the temptation. But He didn’t just draw me toward eliminating the temptation and then leave that space a vacuum that could be filled with other temptations. Instead, He drew me to filling that extra space in my reading time with Christian autobiographies and biographies that could encourage me in my walk with Him instead of tearing me down. Furthermore, He has also convicted me of things I spend too much time doing, even though they aren’t bad, and that has led to placing limitations on my writing time. I only write two hours a day, at most, instead of writing every spare moment. This leaves me with time to focus on His word and prayer as well as time to spend with those who can help encourage me in my walk with Him.

For you, it might be the same, but it’s highly likely that it’s something else. Maybe it’s a friendship that doesn’t point you closer to Christ. Maybe it’s cutting back on social activities to ensure you can make Him a priority. For every individual, it’s a little different, but the outflow of those changes is the same: a clearly set-apart, different life that reflects the nature of the One we are walking closely with.

Signposts of a Set-Apart Life

As a natural outflow of the changes in our focus, attitude, and hearts, our lives will begin to show clear differences from the world. As Romans 8:7-10 says, the spirit and the flesh are in enmity. They cannot coexist. Those who live in the Spirit, set-apart to God, display the qualities of their Master, Christ. They exude an unusual peace, joy, and confidence. They aren’t perfect, but they seem to have an inner radiance that is unexplained by any worldly lifestyle or standard.

Another sign of a set-apart life that, though the person is not living in sin or in anything worthy of reproach, they are still ridiculed. For example, young people who choose to honor God and their future spouse by staying pure physically and emotionally are mocked, and these days, it isn’t just the world that does the mocking. It can even be people within the church who should have been supporting and guiding, not discouraging and rebuking. If you take a strong view on sin? You’re seen as being intolerant. Refuse to abide bad language, crude jokes, and inappropriate behavior, you’re a prude or a goody-two-shoes.

Choosing to live the right way out of genuine love for our Lord will give us an inner loveliness, but the world doesn’t value that sort of beauty and so, as a whole, will deride, dismiss, and detest it in others because it brings conviction and uncomfortability simply by existing and refusing to take part in the unholy activities of the world or by giving up behaviors and things that pull us away from God.

The Character of a Set-Apart Life

But a set-apart life is also characterized by a spirit of meekness and love. One who is walking in the Spirit and living holy before God is one who adorns the Gospel of Christ and makes it lovely. This means that, even when we must tell someone they are doing wrong according to the Scripture, we do it in a way that is tempered with grace and love. A set-apart Christian is one God is teaching daily to approach those around them with gracious truth.

Those who are living in Christ may at times have to take a firm stand against sin (in fact, it is inevitable that this will happen). But when they do so, the attitude in which they do it will be markedly different from those who are following a list of rules. There will be not only Bible behind what they say but also a spirit of humility. At times, the truth must be stated bluntly. As Proverbs says, there is a time to answer the fool according to his foolishness. But most of the time, in dealing with the world around us, harshness under the guise of being blunt is the MO of Christians who have the right doctrine but are not approaching those erring from that doctrine or those truths in a humble, love-centered mindset.

On the flip side, there are those who sacrifice the truth because they would prefer not to offend in the name of “love”. A set-apart Christian is prone to one or the other of these areas as much as any Christian, but their lives will reflect the balance Christ had in His approach to people. At times, a stern rebuke may be called for so long as it is done from a heart of humility and concern for God’s glory as well as for that person. But at other times, a stern rebuke would do more damage than good, and a soft answer is necessary. Only the life that is walking in step with Christ will reflect the balanced approach needed to respond to both individuals and situations in a Christ-like manner.

The Conversation of a Set Apart Life

Often, though we may face social disdain and ridicule from society, I have found in my life that when I am walking close to God and focusing on Him, it comes out in my conversations with unbelievers in a way that results not in scorn but instead in either bewilderment or appreciation. This isn’t because I’m somehow finding a magical formula for approaching others. It’s simply because when I’m walking close to God and my mind is focused on God, my view of people is aligned with His view of people. He died for sinners, and I am talking to sinners (whether saved or not). Should my actions not reflect the same love of Christ that was both meek and lion-hearted at the same time? Should my discussions with non-believers not reflect His firm remark to the woman at the well regarding her sin but also His gentleness with the sinners He came to save?

More often than not, it is those who are religious and have become puffed up in their own perceived righteousness that are most critical and cruel to those living in sin or even in some perceived “error”, and they, like the Pharisees, must be firmly rebuked.

But those who are un-believers? I have often received the comment that I was “not what they expected” or that even though I stand for my beliefs and am firm on the Bible, I am “more open-minded than most conservative Christians”. They define conservative Christians as harsh, unfeeling, uncaring, and prideful. At times I have been all of those things, and I know this response from any unbeliever I may come into contact with is through no merit of my own. In and of myself, I can be exactly what they believe all conservative Christians are: unduly judgmental, harsh, critical, and unloving in the way I present the truth. I naturally lean toward the side that is inclined to look at those living lives not in line with Scripture and to turn my nose up at them. But God has shown me a better way and has patiently worked on me (and still is working on me) to develop His purity, holiness, and loveliness in me and in the way that I interact with people.

The God-Given Encouragement in Living a Set Apart Life

My point in saying this is to simply encourage you that though the world’s system will mock you and many individuals may also do so, there will be those in your workplace, your school, and your neighborhood that take notice when God is shaping your words, actions, and attitudes. And they will not only take notice, but they will appreciate it. They will be more willing to ask you to pray for them and for those they care about. They will understand that somehow, you are an individual that is close to Him. They censor their behavior too, in many cases.

I’ve seen this time and time again in my life and that of others. Many of the people I know refrain from swearing around me because they’ve noticed that I don’t swear. A few weeks to a month ago, my coworkers and I were discussing the issues with the virus, and I mentioned that if you’re feeling ill and have symptoms, you should get tested. I stated that I’d been ill over one weekend and had gone to get tested because I didn’t know what was causing the issue.

I felt better the next day (and didn’t have the virus, as it turned out), but I went anyway just in case. My boss remarked that many people my age can’t tell the difference between being hungover, allergies, and actually having the virus. But she followed it up by saying, “Of course, we know your problem isn’t going to be a hangover.”

They knew that to be true because of looking at how I talk, dress, act, and live my life. They knew that because of my stance on the Bible, I wouldn’t do certain things, and drinking is one of them because I don’t want to open any door for Satan to gain a foothold through insobriety and drunkenness. My hope is that all of those in my life see Christ in me and that with each passing day, the image of my Lord and Savior grows clearer. But if I’m not living a set-apart life, that will not be true of me.

The Power to Live a Set Apart Life

Of course, we wouldn’t fully cover the topic if we didn’t take a moment here at the end to focus on where the power to do this comes from. It can never come from us because in and of ourselves we are unholy, unlovely, and thoroughly sin-stained creatures. Instead, the power to live the kind of set-apart life that honors God comes from living in Him and in His power.

It comes from walking closely with Him and from going to him for strength every day whether we are struggling with any given temptation or not. It comes from our relationship with our King and Heavenly Father, not from within ourselves. It comes from listening closely to the voice of the Holy Spirit as He does His work to guide us through God’s Word and through the conscience that God has given each and every one of us.

The moment that we allow any hint of pride to creep in and begin to believe that we have the strength in ourselves to achieve this set-apart life of purity and holiness is the moment that we lose the battle. Our greatest enemy is our own flesh in so many instances, and the only way we can combat it is if we’re living out our position in Christ.

Conclusion

A set-apart life isn’t easy. There must be sacrifices to live in step with a holy God. While our salvation is secured by grace through faith and can never be lost no matter how heinous the sin (See 1 & 2 Corinthians for an example), our fellowship and friendship with God can be broken if we clutter our lives with unholy things, idols of any shape or form, sin of any sort, or so much busyness that God is pushed off to only when we can “make time” for Him.

But as much as a holy life isn’t easy, the worth of it is beyond measure. It’s worth any cost. If you’ve been on the fence on the matter of set-apart living, I encourage you to take the first steps toward it. Spend some time in serious prayer asking God to show you what He would have you to remove or to add, and ask Him to soften your heart toward Him. This soul-searching should be coupled with His Word to shine a spotlight on your soul and any areas of your heart and life that need cleansing.

If there are things you already know need to go, get rid of them and put down some boundaries in those areas that will help you to ensure you don’t let those things creep back in. A holy, set-apart life is of immeasurable value. Don’t let it pass you by because you bought into the lies of an unholy, ungodly culture around you.

Sunday Stories – Set-Apart Living Pt. 1

Featured Ariel Paiement

Introduction

One of the things I’ve been thinking about—and have been finding God poking at me about recently—is the idea of being set apart to Him. All too often in life, it’s easy to become so busy and so focused on our goals that we, as Christians, crowd God out. Even though the activities themselves may not be wrong, in and of themselves, if they’re putting God in second place or causing us to “fit” God in, then they’re getting in the way of a life that is holy (or set apart) before God. This will be a two-part series since I know there’s a lot of information here. This week, we’ll focus on the definition of set-apart living, why it matters, and what it isn’t. Next week, we’ll talk about how we can practically live a set-apart life according to Scripture as Christians in an increasingly hostile world.

How Do I Define Set-Apart Living?

It’s important to note here that, while set-apart living is often discussed in the arena of sexual purity or encouraging kids not to do drugs and drink, that is not all there is to it or even the main focus that we should have in discussing the subject. Sometimes some speakers or pastors will talk about it in a broader sense. Here I’m going to talk about it in the broader definition. I define set-apart living as living a life that is focused entirely on God. Set-apart living or living a holy life is living within the world but not being of the world. A person living this sort of life is going to look markedly different in their daily lives from someone who is not living set-apart to God. They won’t do, say, or listen to the same things as the world around them does. To those who do not see them frequently, the difference in their way of living may not be, immediately, clear. To those who see them every day, however, it is obvious that they are not the same and that the difference can only be attributed to a close, personal walk with God, not mere religion or personality.

What Does It Matter?

These days, not many appreciate a man or woman who has wholly given themselves to God. People who do so are often called radicals or, worse yet, cult leaders. I know a few good Christian leaders that have been accused of that. It has usually been on the grounds that they’ve chosen to live a life that exemplifies high standards of purity that “no one can expect to achieve” or that they preach a lifestyle that can be lived without knowing sin in God’s power.

And yet, these radicals and “cult leaders” do manage to achieve these standards by the grace of God. They are not perfect, and they do sin. However, they are not living in a lifestyle that encourages or fosters it, and they have removed the hindrances that might cause them to stumble in their walk with God or stagnate in the same. As such, the work He has done through their ministries is nothing short of astounding in most cases.

It has been my observation that many Christian leaders wish they’d see this success, but they rob themselves of it because they focus on everything they’re doing for God but forgo a focus on the One they’re doing it for. They talk well, but they do not practice the principles laid out for those wishing to see God move in their lives. They do not seek to utterly remove self from the equation so that in every way they may exemplify Christ, and so they meet with mediocre success.

Even in the church, it’s common to get weird looks from people if you choose to live entirely set apart to God. You don’t have to live like a monk in a monastery to get those looks, by the way. Things as simple as refusing to make fun of someone, not engaging in gossip, or refusing to watch, listen to, or read even certain “Christian” things are enough in many cases.

Given the Reasons to Bother

So, in a world that doesn’t value any semblance of godly living and with a church that is increasingly following suite, what’s the point? Why bother with this at all instead of just going with the rest of the world and much of the church in deciding that holy, godly living is impossible and entirely unnecessary?

The obvious reason, to me, is that we are to seek God’s approval, not men’s applause (Gal. 1:10). We are bought with a price, according to 1 Corinthians 6:20, and we are no longer our own but His. If we are truly His, then, there ought to be a desire within us to live a life pleasing to Him and to be in fellowship with Him, not with the world. This does not mean, of course, that we never fall or that we never choose sin over God. We, like the Israelites, sin time and again. But a Christian who is living in the Spirit and not according to the flesh is able to feed themselves in the Word and is convicted by God of that sin. A Christian living carnally or in the flesh is unable to feed themselves in the Word and needs to be rebuked for failing to follow even the most obvious of commands (See 1 and 2 Corinthians for an example of a church in this state). The Bible has a great deal to say to Christians about living in the Spirit instead of the flesh, and it is clear that we, even as His children, have the choice to live in sin. But a believer who is rooted in Him and exemplifies Paul’s prayer for the Ephesians, in Ephesians 1:16-23, will not live in sin forever. The fellowship they have known is broken when they live in sin, and those who have known that fellowship feel its loss keenly. They, then can continue in sin only if they sear their conscience and grieve the Spirit.

This then leads to the other reason which, though not our main focus as Christians, is no less important to our lives than the first was. The second reason that set-apart living matters is because it brings life more abundant. It brings a life that, while it is not always free of hardship and persecution, is filled with peace, joy, and fulfillment as you walk with Him. So, the only reason we need for why this matters is that He saved us to Himself and asks it of us, He also promises us blessings and more, beyond the already immense kindness he showed in saving our souls from damnation.

If we are His, adopted into His family through grace, then we are no more the servants of sin but are instead the servants of God. This matters because true Christians can never be content living in known sin without searing their conscience and grieving the Holy Spirit. Paul warns us not to do this very clearly in Ephesians 4:30. It brings grief to God’s heart when we choose the world’s way after all He did to free us from that into a better way in Him. We are, therefore, called on to live lives set apart to God even as we live in the midst of a wicked, corrupt world, and so we then must sin if we put anything before Him.

There is no sin we can do that is greater than robbing God of His rightful place and His glory in our lives. To do so is to deny the Creator His rights and our God His temple (1 Cor. 3:10-23). The other sins that we often focus on in the church, such as sexual immorality, drunkenness, addictions to drugs, and other “big ticket” sins, are (though clearly wrong and denounced in Scripture) merely the outgrowth of a life that is not given over to God. It is a life that is putting self and flesh on the throne, not God and Spirit.

These sins have no place in the Spirit-filled Christian life. If seen, other Christians, living in the Spirit, are instructed to go to them in love and rebuke the behavior so that they may turn around before they face the fullness of God’s corrective power in their lives (1 Cor. 5). These Christian brothers and sisters who are rebuked may not return immediately, but those who are truly His will return.

When they do, we are to greet those who do return not as though they are unbelievers but as brothers (2 Cor. 2:5-11; James 5:19-20). So then, choosing to live a life to ourselves, in any area, is to refuse our Lord His rightful place, and to worship anything (self, things, or people) above God is idolatry. As such, living a life set-apart to Him matters for these reasons: we are called to it, we are bought with a price and are not our own, we cannot be wholly blessed if we do not live in Him, and we sin if we place anything above Him in our lives.

What Set Apart Living Is Not

We’ve talked about what set-apart living is and why it matters, but I would be remiss if I didn’t touch on what set-apart living isn’t. Often, the object to holiness or set apartness is that it might lead—or must lead in the minds of some—to austere, monk-like living. While not everyone has this objection and some are honest enough to admit they simply prefer living their way instead of God’s way, many of us who started out more like the Corinthian believers and have had to be brought into this set-apart living by God’s firm but loving hand went through the fears that we would lose friends, might have to give up everything to go sit in a cave somewhere to read our Bibles all day, or might need to become monks. While these fears are blown out of proportion a bit, some people really do have these concerns. Some of us have sat there and thought, “Set apart living is impossible because there’s no way I can spend five or six hours a day just reading and praying.”

The fact of the matter is that isn’t what set-apart living is. Many of the men and women we see in both segments of Christianity lived lives that, while centered on God, involved regular jobs and living in a society that didn’t want them there because they were considered “radical”. God calls on us to live in the Spirit, to be transformed into His likeness, and not to be conformed to the world. He does not say “Dress in sackcloth, eat nothing but the simplest food you can find, and never do anything but read your Bible and pray.”

The Heart of the Issue

While some people genuinely are unsure of what it means to live a set-apart life and are worried they won’t be able to do so and live life too, the real issue is all too often not what we will or will not have to give up in particular. Instead, many who object to set-apart living object because they realize that a set apart life means dying to self. They’re okay with giving up things they think would be good things to give up to show how good they are as people. Some of them may even genuinely believe that giving up things while still living for themselves is living a life that’s “good enough”. But while these people may look good on the outside, if you start talking to many of them about areas of life they don’t want to give up but that are not in line with the Bible, the responses are rarely good. They can range from “Well, that’s not really necessary for today” to “I don’t think God cares” to “That’s one of those outdated things that only old-fashioned or holier-than-thou types do.” This is, of course, by no means a complete list of excuses we as human beings can come up with for why we don’t need to remove the things God has told us to remove. My own excuses usually have been along the lines of “Well, it’s not that bad” or “I’m not doing this really bad thing, so this one little compromise isn’t really a problem”. But they all boiled down to “I want to do this, and I don’t care if God cares or not.”

Living a set apart life will mean giving up the self-focused life and suffering ridicule for the things we choose to omit to make our focus our King instead of ourselves. That much is a guarantee. And too often, we have no desire to put God in charge because we’ll lose friends, activities, or things that we want more than close friendship with our Lord.

Conclusion

What a sad state of affairs when even some who claim the name “Christian” prioritize friends, things, and their own pursuits over the One who died one of the worst deaths known to man to rescue our souls from eternal damnation. He did all of that so we could have eternal fellowship with Him! At times, I daresay, we have all been guilty of doing this, but it should be the exception, not the rule, friends. Could we deliver any more sound a slap to the face of God than to accept His grace but then refuse to give anything of ourselves in a spirit of love, duty, and gratitude to our Savior? More and more of late, God has been showing me that He is not just Savior. He is also Lord and Master, titles which demand our respect and our devotion, not just a vague sense of gratitude for what He did with zero inclination to live as He has required.